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Author Topic: Could I be pregnant?
Emma Marie
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Member # 107617

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Hi, I'm new here, I just wanted to say that this site is really great and that it's helped me calm down a bit from a recent scare. I've already read "Pregnancy Scared?" but I just want to give my specific situation and see if there's any risk. I'm sure there's no reason to be worried, but I tend to overreact...

So anyway, my boyfriend masturbated and came, and thoroughly washed and dried his hands with soap and water immediately after. By thorough, I truly mean that. He had about a half-dollar sized amount of soap on his hands and was sure to get between the fingers, under the nails, etc. He then fingered me about 15 minutes later. He didn't go very deep inside of me, either.

By tracking my cycle, I'm almost positive I was not ovulating at the time. This all happened over a week ago, and I do not feel any differences in my body, etc. I do have a cold, but I know it's unrelated.

I am unable to acquire a pregnancy test or go to the doctor at this time, but I don't think I need either. I just need some reassurance.

Is there any chance I could be pregnant?

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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Welcome to the boards and the site. [Smile]

Given that you've read through that piece already, and you say there's sure you've no reason to be worried -- and obviously, we'd agree, having written and published that piece -- what do you feel like is missing for you here?

In other words, it sounds like you're already clear what you're posting about doesn't pose a risk of pregnancy. But, since you posted, you're obviously still concerned.

Why do you think that is?

[ 06-04-2013, 01:05 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Emma Marie
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Member # 107617

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I just have a tendency to overreact and second guess myself. With something like this, I'd much rather trust the answer of someone educated in this subject than have to freak out and go out and buy a pregnancy test if I don't have to.

So, I'll ask to ease my mind... There's absolutely no risk of pregnancy in my situation?

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Emma Marie
Neophyte
Member # 107617

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I just have a tendency to overreact and second guess myself. With something like this, I'd much rather trust the answer of someone educated in this subject than have to freak out and go out and buy a pregnancy test if I don't have to.

So, I'll ask to ease my mind... There's absolutely no risk of pregnancy in my situation?

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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Okay. Well, you've read my statements on this already with the pieces you read on the main site, and here I am again. (Like a bad penny. [Razz] ) Where I'm going to say the same thing: this isn't something that poses pregnancy risks.

Hearing that from me again, how does that leave you feeling?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Emma Marie
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A lot better. I'm no longer going to worry about this because I know there's no chance of me being pregnant.

Thanks for your help. (:

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Sure thing. [Smile]

Just to check in, are you feeling like this kind of sexual interaction is something you feel ready for? I ask because often, when someone knows the facts but still keeps having fears like this, one thing typically going on is that they're just moving faster than really works per their own pace and comfort levels.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Emma Marie
Neophyte
Member # 107617

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Yes, I know that manual sex is something I'm ready for. My boyfriend and I have discussed intercourse and we both know we're not ready for it at this point. We're both young, and we want to wait until we're truly ready.

Honestly, the only thing that got me worried in the first place was when my boyfriend called me the night this situation happened, completely worried about nothing in particular. He had been having a bad night and he called me to make sure he had washed his hands before touching me again. Even though I was there with him when he washed his hands, it got me a little worried because of his overreaction.

All of that led to a huge chain of "What if"s in my head. Like, "What if there was still sperm on his hand even though he washed his hands well?" "What if I'm somehow pregnant because of the sperm that may or may not be there?" Etc. It sounds crazy now, but that's because I realize there's no risk, haha.

I also fell for the words of unreliable sources like Yahoo Answers, which really didn't help. I feel really silly now, hahaha. (:

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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So, maybe it's worth talking about if *he* really feels ready? or about what education he feels he might need to feel more comfortable?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Emma Marie
Neophyte
Member # 107617

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I think that's a really good idea. To avoid unnecessary stress from future situations like this, I think I'm going to point him at this website. (:
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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You know, so many guys -- and women -- get the message that while it's a maybe if girls and women are ready, if guys have the opportunity to be sexual, they're always ready.

Of course, that's no more true about guys than it is about anyone else. But those messages are so pervasive, that often couples made of men and women, even well-intended ones, will have talks about if the woman is ready, but no one is asking about or addressing the guy. And guys often won't bring it up, or even ask themselves -- especially if their partner isn't asking -- because those messages can make them worry that if they're not ready, something is the matter with them.

So, if you haven't talked about how ready he really feels, that'd be great to do. especially since his worrying like this is a clue that things might be moving too fast for him, or that before the pace is right, he needs more information.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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