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Author Topic: now what to do??
singhseema128
Neophyte
Member # 101224

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i am in relationship ship with a guy whom i love most in the world from last 2.5 years and we had sex lots of times. now my vagina is loose. i m getting married with another guy next year now i m afraid about my first night with that guy. he will come to know every thing about me but i dont want to tell him anything as it may affect my parents image in society and i dont want it. in INDIA it is crime to have sex before marriage.please somebody help me and i cant marry that guy whom i love. please help me i ll be thankful to u..

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seema

Posts: 4 | From: india | Registered: Dec 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Robin Lee
Volunteer Assistant Director
Member # 90293

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HI Seema and welcome to Scarleteen,

It's really not possible for a sexual partner to be able to tell if someone has had sex before or not. There are people who believe that it is, but they're not correct. So, the only person who knows that you've engaged in intercourse before is you.

I'm not really sure what you mean by your vagina being loose. The vagina is surrounded by muscles, so how loose or tight it is is more about how tense or relaxed someone is than about how much ore little intercourse or other sexual activities they've experienced.

You might find this article on anatomy helpful.

Innies & Outies: The Vagina, Clitoris, Uterus and More

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Robin

Posts: 6066 | From: Washington DC suburbs | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
singhseema128
Neophyte
Member # 101224

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i mean my vagina is more relaxed after abortion.. i did abortion last year.. now what should i do ......??/

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seema

Posts: 4 | From: india | Registered: Dec 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Abortion won't actually change anything about the vagina. It just doesn't have that capacity.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
singhseema128
Neophyte
Member # 101224

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actually i didn't use abortion kit but surgical abortion was made by doctor.. plz tell me what should i do...??? can i use 18again...??? u can check 18again on www.18again.com and after that tell me what i have to do..??? i ll b thankful to u....

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seema

Posts: 4 | From: india | Registered: Dec 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Surgical abortion cannot change the vagina, either. What's happening with surgical abortion is inside the uterus. The instruments involved that go into the vagina are small and do not change the shape or size of the vagina.

I've looked at that link you gave, and not only is it unlikely a cream like that will do anything for anyone, it's simply unlikely your vagina IS "loose." Something like that cream is really just about capitalizing on the kind of fears you're having, and on people's general ignorance about the vulva and vagina: it's a scam.

However, it doesn't look to be unsafe or unhealthy, so if you think you'd feel better about using it, it's really up to you.

I understand you are worried that it is, and it feels different to you, but that is likely a combination of simply not being tense vaginally, changes with puberty, and fears about all of this, fears which are certainly understandable in the culture and situation you're in.

I think our best bet is to see how we can't help you deal with those fears, rather than addressing a physical issue that isn't likely real. Know what I mean?

[ 12-27-2012, 10:41 AM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Also, regarding things like that cream, this is an excellent article I think you'd benefit by reading: http://m.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/aug/29/vaginal-cream-ad-sexuality-india

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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