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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Ask Scarleteen » Can't Climax

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Author Topic: Can't Climax
Maddy J
Neophyte
Member # 98428

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Hiya I'm Maddy and I'm 35 and single, the other day I was holding a webcam session when one of the boys asked me to masturbate for him.... after 25mins nothing happen.... my pussy wasnt even wet why?
Posts: 11 | From: Wycombe | Registered: Oct 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Maddy: Scarleteen is intended for teens and young adults between the ages of 15-25. While we're okay helping out older adults sometimes after the young people are services are intended for are taken care of, just so you know, we ask older people to consider they're always second in line.

We also ask older people to please remember this is for younger people, and keep their interactions here appropriate for minors. That includes please choosing language that doesn't make net nannies block site access for our users, please.

I'm going to assume that if you're doing sex work and are also 35, you likely have some level of sexuality education or information available to you, and also likely know a good deal about your own sexual response by now. I'll also assume that at your age, you surely, before now, have experienced plenty of times when you aren't interested in sexual activity, don't feel aroused or don't self-lubricate. So, I'm a bit confused about both what you're asking us here and why: fill us in?

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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(Also, we ask that when registering, users please follow the guidelines, which includes not using full names when posting or in handles, and also being honest about their birthdates. Someone born in 1966 would not be 35, so this is a problem.)

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Maddy J
Neophyte
Member # 98428

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I was feeling neglated by males so a frined suggest a site and got chatting to some boys via webcam when one asked if i could masturbate for him so i did but after 25mins nothing happen and my vagina was not wet?
Posts: 11 | From: Wycombe | Registered: Oct 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
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You know, I'm going to be straight with you.

It seems pretty obvious to me you are the same person who was trolling the site here last week. Maybe I'm wrong, but I don't think so.

My guess is, you have real questions -- unless you're just doing this to amuse yourself -- but aren't the older women (or their daughters) you have claimed to be.

So, how about this: how about instead of banning you yet again, or wasting our time playing games, you just be whoever you actually are, and ask us the questions you want to ask about women's bodies? Answering questions is what we do here, for free, no less, but we ask that users be real with us so that we can actually do our jobs well.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Maddy J
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Member # 98428

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I am telling the genuine truth Heather and my question is a really question? I was used in my last relationship and ended up falling pregnant and i haven't had a relationship since but when my daughter bought her boyfriend home he got me excited and i haven't felt the same since?
Posts: 11 | From: Wycombe | Registered: Oct 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
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Can I then ask why, yet again, your birthdate doesn't match your age at all, and you're asking questions about your body at an apparent age that would be very unusual questions for someone that age TO be asking?

Seriously, we know that you're trolling and that you are the same person from last week. Taking up our time with playing games is just going to result in another ban, because we're not going to waste our limited time and resources like we did last week again.

[ 11-02-2012, 03:18 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Maddy J
Neophyte
Member # 98428

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I'm not trolling at all..... yes I'm asking about my body at 35 but i never had the motive to masturbate till the webcam, like i sed i was used, he stuck his penis in me and dump his load and ran off i have tried servile times to contact him but he doesn't answer....... my daughter bought her boyfriend home to meet me and he said "Gosh Bea your mom's really hot I love to see you both naked" and i felt like a old fossil.
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Heather
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Well, a boyfriend coming home and meeting a daughter's mother and saying that isn't about a generational gap. That would be about a person who clearly had no boundaries or manners, and perhaps learned everything they had about interactions from really cheesy porn movies.

I know that you are trolling, but I am willing to answer questions regardless, though I'd prefer we didn't have top play games to do it.

But if we must, then going with the narrative you have here, it would strike me that someone at 35 who had been though pregnancy and childbirth and was asking the kinds of things you are is a person who is very late on some very basic sexuality education and education about their own body. As well, it would strike me that someone at 35 with a grown daughter whose response to a boyfriend saying something like that would be to feel old, rather than to feel concerned about their daughter being in a relationship with someone who would do and say something like that suggests a lack of very basic relationship education, too, as well as a lack of basic parenting education or even basic concern for a daughter.

What I'd suggest, then, for that person, is that they seek out that education. I can certainly suggest links here and elsewhere and books for this kind of information, but I'd also suggest that person ask for an educational visit with their OB/GYN so they can get more basic information on their own body, including basic sexual response.

[ 11-02-2012, 03:34 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Maddy J
Neophyte
Member # 98428

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i would never troll as it wrong...... he seems very nice and I think he only said it to cheer me up, yes i have been through childbirth and pregnancy but i'm still learning about my limits etc, I'm currently a teacher at a primary school teacher kids about science so when i get an orge to rub down there i hold it off until after school by the time its vanished.

I have seen many doctors and specialist about my problem but no one can find the problem

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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And none of these doctors have ever explained to you the very basic facts of how your body parts work, like that you will not always lubricate or feel aroused? Nor have you, yourself, ever looked up some very basic sex education, online or at the library, to find out about that by now?

Why would you possibly have been sent to a specialist for something that isn't a "problem" at all, but simply the way bodies work?

On the other hand, if you are feeling like a young man dating your daughter saying that to you is NOT an issue (or even is "nice,"), or find you are struggling to keep yourself from masturbating while working, THOSE things suggest possible problems, the kind where the typical advised treatment would be psychological therapy. Has that been suggested for you?

[ 11-02-2012, 04:11 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Maddy J
Neophyte
Member # 98428

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I have been to psychological therapist but during school i start feeling wet between my legs and really horny but i wait to after school and when i get home it just disappears like magic, I tried having a quick one in the morning before i start work, during lunch break and even pull over on the way home but nothing works.

I know it sound strange but i wouldn't be asking if i knew what to do?

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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It still is unclear WHAT you are asking, so perhaps you could try and ask us a clear question, or respond more directly to the answers and feedback we have already given you?

It would also help if you stayed consistent with what you are sharing here: you opened this thread asking why you were not aroused by one incident, and now you appear to be describing arousal that is a very atypical constant.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Maddy J
Neophyte
Member # 98428

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sorry yeah its kinda both...... Like I said I was only doing the site because I was bored as its half term and i had no work to mark and i thought i had a free house so i used my time to try a little experiment but for some reason I couldn't get aroused and the boy turn off and type "What women cant even get aroused on her own" so when my daughter got home I asked her "if she ever had problems with get aroused" she replied "yeah last night no matter what position we tried my vagina wouldn't let my boyfriends penis enter"

Yet some reason during work it just suddenly happens?

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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I am still very uncertain what you are actually asking for an answer to.

If your question is why you can be very aroused sometimes but not others, though, that's very simple: because that's how human sexuality works, for just about everyone, of every gender. So again, if that's the question, it appears you need some very basic sex education. You can read the main website here, or perhaps access a good basic book about women's sexual health and sexuality, like Our Bodies, Ourselves. Or, you can talk to the many doctors it seems you have had access to.

However, between this account and posts and those you made under the other handles last week, you have been describing, at best, a problematic, and at worst, a very unhealthy lack of sexual boundaries between you and the person who is apparently your child. If that has not been discussed with your therapist, I strongly suggest you do so.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Maddy J
Neophyte
Member # 98428

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I'm not the same person from last week Heather, yes I do know Brenda but I'm not her......... I have talks with my daughter about such matters and she said there are some days her vagina is a dry as a bone and others we it is wet has the sea

My orges happen between 11am-2pm, it starts of with me feeling light headed then my nipples harden then my pussy starting lubricating as if its preparing to entered but then at 5pm nothing, I've tried vibrators, toys, masturbation but nothing..... I reckon its a scent in nthe class room

Posts: 11 | From: Wycombe | Registered: Oct 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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