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Author Topic: Found out bf is ten years older. Is it ok?
SunRainbowWomanhere133726
Neophyte
Member # 94633

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I'm seventeen years old. I assumed that the man I've been seeing wasn't too much older than me when we met because he's in university, but I just found out that he's 27. We've already had sex, and I checked- our relationship is legal where I live.
I dont know whether I should stay with him or not. Is it gross? I know that I cant tell my mom his age, because she'll be freaked out and tell me to break up with him. Is she right?
Most of my friends tell me to break it off with him. I really like him, and he likes me. But I also dont like that I have to hide him from my family. Im really stuck.
Any words of advice?

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sunrainbowwomanwashere

Posts: 3 | From: Canada | Registered: Feb 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Robin Lee
Volunteer Assistant Director
Member # 90293

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There's certainly nothing "gross" about the two of you dating with an age difference.

I'm curious about how you feel about it, regardless of what other people say and how other people feel.

I'm also curious about whether you feel deceived, whether you think he may have intentionally not told you.

Knowing that he is that much older than you, how do you think this could affect the relationship. People who are seventeen are usually in very different places in their lives than are people who are twenty-seven. So again, how do you feel this changes your relationship to him, and the way you will relate to each other in the future asyou finish high school and move forward with your life?

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Robin

Posts: 6066 | From: Washington DC suburbs | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
SunRainbowWomanhere133726
Neophyte
Member # 94633

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I really like him. We have so much in common, and he's really interesting and respectful and mature. We both have goals we want to achieve before we settle down with someone, and he was in the army before he started university, and has now changed his major so we'll be in university together for a while. He is infatuated with me right now, and I think we're a very good match...but it does bother me that we may not have any support from my friends and family, because I do value their opinions and support too.
It's hurtful to me that I might not get support from the people I love on a matter really important to me, I guess is what Im trying to say. Especially because I value their opinions so much.

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sunrainbowwomanwashere

Posts: 3 | From: Canada | Registered: Feb 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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