Donate Now
  
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Ask Scarleteen » Few questions

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Few questions
maverick015
Neophyte
Member # 93590

Icon 1 posted      Profile for maverick015     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hello,

I've been reading around the sight to try and assess my risks for getting my girlfriend pregnant, and it seems that I don't have a high risk of pregnancy but I just want to clarify why.

1.) Fingering with precum- If it does contain sperm, why does this not pose a pregnancy risk? Will wiping your fingers off on your clothes kill any sperm on your fingers? When you say there's not a risk, does this mean it's impossible or does it mean that the risk is so low that it's not worth worrying? A lot of other sources say it's entirely impossible. Why does this sight say different?

2.) Why does ejaculating in water not pose a pregnancy risk? Specifically a hot tub? I read that they don't swim in water, but I don't understand why. My girlfriend and I were both naked but not touching each other. Does this change anything?

3.) About implantation bleeding... When it does happen, what color is it? Does it come with any other symptoms? Specifically, cramping, bloating, sore breasts, etc.?

4.) My girlfriend is on an antibiotic and birth control. Is there a way to tell if the pill is effective/ if you're ovulating? When my girl did have her withdrawal bleeds, it came always on the day that she was on her placebo pills. But once she stopped the antibiotics she had light spotting that was brown/dark red a few days before her withdrawal bleed. (This is the reason for my 3rd question, I was concerned about implantation bleeding). Can stopping the antibiotic throw her cycle out of whack?

5.) Is direct genital contact/ejaculating directly on the vagina really the only way you can get pregnant?

Thanks!

Posts: 18 | From: America | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
1) Sperm cells are delicate. They need pretty specific conditions to create a pregnancy. Setting aside fertility on the part of the person with the eggs and uterus, that means things like the right amount of semen and a direct route to the vagina. They don't fare well with getting passed around that way.

2) Again, this is about changing the very specific environment sperm cells need -- particularly, staying in semen, a lack of big temp changes, etc. -- and about the lack of direct contact.

3) It isn't common. Usually, it doesn't happen. When it does, it usually is just light, watery, brief spotting, with no other symptoms.

4) The way to tell the pill is working is if someone becomes pregnant or doesn't. Did her pharmacist say she's using an antibiotic which could interfere with her pill? If so, have you two used a backup method as advised?

5) Well, IVF is one way people can become pregnant now, too. But the way most people, the vast majority of the time, become pregnant is via direct genital-to-genital contact or direct contact of semen with the vulva or very nearby. COULD it happen other ways? It could, but it is highly unlikely. And if reliable methods of contraception are being used properly, that's unlikely enough per other ways that I feel comfortable saying it is just not going to happen, period.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
maverick015
Neophyte
Member # 93590

Icon 1 posted      Profile for maverick015     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Thanks for your quick reply! I just have a lot of curiosity about these things. Just to clarify, my girlfriend and I are waiting to have actual intercourse until we are married, or at least engaged, so I'm not completely worried about a pregnancy risk, it just seems like recently she's had a lot of symptoms that could be pregnancy, but could also be something completely different. I'm about 95% sure we haven't done anything that could have directly resulted in a pregnancy, but then the other 5% of the time, I worry and try to think of possible situations where something might have happened that I am just not remembering.

Just to follow up:

1.) I had a typo in my original post. I meant to say that a lot of other sources say it's entirely POSSIBLE to get pregnant from precum on a finger. I just don't know what to believe, but I'm assuming I can trust this site. Since I'm not sure I even had any on my hand on the first place, I don't masturbate so there's wasn't likely any sperm leftover sperm either, and if I had any precum, I would have at least wiped it off on my shirt or pants, I SHOULD be okay here, correct?

2.) That makes sense, I was just worried since we were both naked in the hot tub if there was any chance. My penis wasn't anywhere near her vagina and I aimed away from her completely when i ejaculated. No chance here?

3.) So, if one of our risks could have resulted in a pregnancy... My girlfriend normally has an on time withdrawal bleed, that is usually dark red/ brown with normal PMS symptoms, and this time she had the exact same color blood, just not as much and all of her normal symptoms, just a few days early, this is not likely implantation bleeding? I understand spotting is common, but it concerned me when she told me about it because she's been on her birth control for awhile and never had spotting. Is it possible that she is having more side effects and an unusual cycle because her body is readjusting after taking the antibiotics? Or is this just a coincidence?

4.) I think it was actually her Gyn that said her antibiotic (for acne) MAY affect it. But antibiotics do not make it completely ineffective correct? I've read other places, including the planned parenthood site, that only rifamprin makes bc ineffective, but other's do not at all. I've also read a response from a scarleteen volunteer on another post that if you're getting a withdrawal bleed when you're supposed to on your placebos that you can be sure that you're not ovulating, so you're birth control is not affected by antibiotics? Is there any truth to that? Also, since we haven't been having the type of sex that directly results in a pregnancy, we haven't been using a back up method.

5.) I assume IVF stands for in vitro fertilization, as in when the egg is fertilized outside of the body? (Don't ask how I know that haha)

Posts: 18 | From: America | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
This piece might help you out: Chicken Soup for the Pregnancy Symptom Freakout's Soul. I'd pay special attention to what it says about "symptoms" of pregnancy.

1) Is it POSSIBLE for a pregnancy to happen from semen on the hands, then hands right on someone's vulva? Yes. But it's also very, very unlikely, especially if someone is not literally ejaculating on their fingers then immediately inserting them into a vagina.

2) Yep. Sperm are delicate. They do not have superpowers. [Smile]

3) Nope, doesn't sound like implantation bleeding. But if it was, she should also get positive results on a pregnancy test. Spotting can happen for a lot of reasons, certainly as a side effect of hormonal BC, even if someone hadn't had that side effect before.

4) No, antibiotics do not make the pill totally ineffective. One class of them *may* interact with the pill, but that also may not mean less effectiveness. But the jury is still out so with those, a backup method is suggested.

5) IVF means that someone is a way of creating a pregnancy with lab/medical assistance, such as when someone is using a sperm donor. But that, too, means very carefully and specifically storing semen.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
maverick015
Neophyte
Member # 93590

Icon 1 posted      Profile for maverick015     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Thank you so much Heather! This site is great! Exactly what I needed.

One final question...

So, if I had a little bit of PRE-cum on my fingers, which I'm not even sure I did, most likely not, and I wiped it off on some clothing, and then fingered my girlfriend is there basically no chance of pregnancy whatsoever?

Posts: 18 | From: America | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Happy to be of help. [Smile]

And yeah, I'd say no. pregnancy from pre-ejaculate is already much less likely than from a full ejaculation, but once we're then also talking about indirect contact? Nope.

Just bear in mind, though, that not washing hands before engaging in manual sex DOES pose infection risks, especially of bacterial infections. So washing is always more sound than wiping. No one likes BV or a UTI.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ron12
Neophyte
Member # 93615

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Ron12     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hi i am new here and i have been raped 4 times by my cousin which I still cant't overcome my trauma from it. I would like to now how to overcome my several panic attacks that occurs in a dally bases!
Posts: 8 | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Ron: can you make a thread that's just for you, rather than adding on to a thread like this that isn't about this topic? I'd sure hate for posts about needing this kind of help to get lost in the shuffle. What you want to do to do that is go into any page of the boards and click "new topic" in the upper right hand corner. That'll let you make your own thread.

We can absolutely help to connect you with resources and care around this. When you make that new topic, it'd be helpful to fill us in on what kind of help and support, if any, you have had with healing so far.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
maverick015
Neophyte
Member # 93590

Icon 1 posted      Profile for maverick015     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hello again, sorry I have another question.

About two and a half weeks ago my girlfriend was late taking her pill by about 9 hours. Apparently she was so tired and she went to take it and missed her mouth completely. Strange, I know. Well she woke up the next morning and took it right away. Will this cause it to be less effective? This is the first time she's EVER missed a pill. If it does reduce the effectiveness, how long until she has maximum protection again?

I ask because tonight we were rubbing our genitals together through our underwear (We both had underwear on) and I noticed my boxers were pretty wet with pre ejaculate. Does this pose a risk since she missed was late on a pill more than two weeks ago?

Posts: 18 | From: America | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
September
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 25425

Icon 1 posted      Profile for September     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
A pill does not need to be considered late until it's been more than 12 hours. But also, when you do miss a pill, as long as you make it up right away and then go back to taking it exactly as directed, you can usually consider yourself at full protection again after a week.

So, her pill wasn't late anyway, she made it up as soon as she remembered and she then continued to take the pill as directed for another two weeks - on the pill front, you're fine.

But also, even without all that, it doesn't sound like you had a risk anyway, since you were both wearing underwear.

--------------------
Johanna
Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

Posts: 9192 | From: Cologne, Germany | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
maverick015
Neophyte
Member # 93590

Icon 1 posted      Profile for maverick015     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
So I have another question...

What makes this sight more credible for information than other sites? Specifically the planned parenthood site? Not being rude, because I'm sure this is a great site, but why can I trust it?

They make it seem on their message boards like there is a viable risk from fingering with precum and they also say that antibiotics have no impact on birth control effectiveness whatsoever. Why is there conflicting information?

Posts: 18 | From: America | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Well, I would not say we are more credible than Planned Parenthood. We consider them allies, and they do same, and I think their site and information is highly credible.

So, I'd have to know what you're comparing us to, and what you mean when you say we're "more credible." I mean, we know all of who writes for us by name and background, as ED, I've worked in this field now for nearly a decade and a half (and for either years as an educator before then), we fact-check things here, we all engage in continuing education, everything is moderated....I could go on, but it'd help to know more of what you are looking for specifically around verifying credibility.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
maverick015
Neophyte
Member # 93590

Icon 1 posted      Profile for maverick015     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Sites like eHealth and steadyhealth.com. Have you heard of those? I've noticed a lot of those are open sites where anybody can respond, but they also have doctors who respond and make it seem like getting pregnant without intercourse or direct genital contact/ejaculation is very easy and likely. This site makes more sense to me because it's explained a lot more in depth, but why do those sites make it sound so likely?
Posts: 18 | From: America | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
The sites, though, what you're reading there, are you reading the content posted from their staff or from general users on forums, content that has NOT been approved by those site themselves?

It's hard for me to know what you mean in your last question without seeing exactly what you're looking at. want to link me to a thread or two you're looking at and we can go through them together?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
maverick015
Neophyte
Member # 93590

Icon 1 posted      Profile for maverick015     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I guess I've made my question a little confusing. I was just wondering why I could trust this site. I know I can, I'm just a little skeptical about things on the internet

Anyway, I have a new question...

In my original post I said I was worried about implantation bleeding since I thought I had a risk and since my girlfriend had light spotting 4 days before her period in November and then didn't have one last month. Well she just told me she had what she thinks is her period, but once again it's early and it's brownish/red spotting but She still has 1 more active pill left. So basically, since she's stopped taking antibiotics, she's had a period 4 days early, missed a period, and had one 2 days early. Is this normal to continually get your withdrawal bleed before you start your placebo pills? Or should she be concerned? She has her normal symptoms that come with her period (moodiness, cramping, sore breasts).

As a side note, her gynecologist has told her that skipping her period is normal on this brand of pill. But why would she be having this problem 8 months after starting this brand? Does it have to do with her body readjusting after stopping the antibiotic or what? I'm just curious, not worried.

Posts: 18 | From: America | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Stephanie_1
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 36725

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Stephanie_1     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
What I always suggest when you're worried about statistics is to check the research. A lot of our articles have links at the bottom to sites and books that give the information.

If you think that your partner is pregnant, really the best thing to do is for her to take a pregnancy test. Though you may also wait and see if this light bleeding does become more normal first too if you wish.

Per the pills? Some people don't start missing bleeds until they've been on them for a while. It really just depends on the individual. If she's worried or it makes her uncomfortable missing bleeds she may discuss with her doctor getting a different brand.

--------------------
"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side" ~Anon

Posts: 3429 | From: Pennsylvania | Registered: Jan 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
maverick015
Neophyte
Member # 93590

Icon 1 posted      Profile for maverick015     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Neither of us are really worried about a pregnancy, we both were originally but seeing as we haven't done anything that poses a high risk of pregnancy, she hasn't really had any symptoms (besides urinating a little more than usual), and she always has weird periods because of her birth control, we're not so worried anymore.

Her birth control is designed for her to have shorter, lighter periods, or no period at all. So usually all it ever is, if she gets a period, is spotting for a day at the most and it's usually dark red or brown and either she gets her PMS symptoms, or she doesn't. It just depends. The only reason I was curious is because it's starting to come before she begins her placebo pills. She said it does feel like her "normal" period, she had all of her normal symptoms, and it was even a little heavier than it usually is, it's just 2 days early.

Just as a timeline:

Early November: possible "risk"
November 20: "period" 4 days early, normal PMS symptoms
December 22: no bleeding, normal PMS symptoms came on time
January 17: "period" 2 days early, normal PMS symptoms

Do you see a need to be concerned?

Posts: 18 | From: America | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Kachina
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 42505

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Kachina     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
If you arent worried about pregnancy anymore, what is it you are asking about?

--------------------
~Kat
Scarleteen Volunteer

Humans are allergic to change. They love to say, "We've always done it this way." I try to fight that. That's why I have a clock on my wall that runs counter-clockwise. - Grace Hopper

Posts: 876 | From: Seattle | Registered: Apr 2009  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
maverick015
Neophyte
Member # 93590

Icon 1 posted      Profile for maverick015     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I guess I'm just curious why her "period" is coming during her last few active pills rather than her inactive pills? She's always been on time until a few months ago. Does this mean her BC is ineffective or what? She started her placebo pills lastnight but she had a heavier than normal bleed two days ago, and then just light bleeding since, with all of her PMS symptoms.

Also, I'm kinda curious about decidual/first trimester bleeding...even thought I'm pretty confident my girlfriend is NOT pregnant. I know it's pretty rare, but what is the difference between that and a normal period? Like does it come with all of the normal symptoms you get when you have a period or what?

Sorry for all the questions, even though I'm not worried anymore, I just like being informed!

Posts: 18 | From: America | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Robin Lee
Volunteer Assistant Director
Member # 90293

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Robin Lee     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
If your girlfriend is concerned about why her withdrawal bleed starts a few days before she starts the placebo pills, then it's worth her talking to her doctor. Quite likely it's a quirk of her body (not likely that the pill is less effective), but a good way to know is for her to seek a medical opinion. Of course, this is a choice she would make herself if she is concerned.

When something is rare, such as first trimester bleeding, it's hard to say what it is typically like, since it doesn't happen to a lot of people and is likely a little different for each person. Does that make sense?

Since you are interested for interest's sake, I'll give you this article from Web MD about bleeding during different trimesters of pregnancy. You can also do your own research, but make sure that what you're reading is sound, and that you have a good reason to believe that it's accurate--that the source knows what it's talking about. Again, though, this is just for informational purposes, not because you think your girlfriend is pregnant, right? One thing that happens to medical students when they enter medical school is that they think they have every single illness they read about. I just mention that because it's very common to read something and go: "Oh, that's like...."

But, with that caveat, here's the article:

http://www.webmd.com/baby/guide/bleeding-during-pregnancy

[ 01-19-2012, 09:34 PM: Message edited by: Robin Lee ]

--------------------
Robin

Posts: 6066 | From: Washington DC suburbs | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
maverick015
Neophyte
Member # 93590

Icon 1 posted      Profile for maverick015     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Thanks for your help. Could the early period this month have anything to do with her being late on a pill about 3 weeks ago? Or does that not have anything to do with that...?
Posts: 18 | From: America | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3

Google
Search Scarleteen