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Author Topic: How Do I Tell My Parents?
Sore Throat
Member # 35705

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Okay, so I've established now that I am definitely a transgender male, but now I need to know how I should tell my parents this.

I just turned sixteen this past week and I'm a sophomore in high school.
Over the summer I thought and misread my confusion and discomfort but (obvious attraction to women)as being a lesbian. I finally got the courage to tell my parents that I was gay.

My mom tried to take it well, but I think over all she took it okay, but my dad was definitely fine with it. He said he just wanted me to be a good person.

I told my sister that I was a transgender male and she said that I shouldn't tell my parents because I had already caused enough drama as it was.

The thing is, even though I know nothing is going to happen now because I'm high school but I really wanted to start taking hormones as soon as I graduated high school and look into getting top surgery.
Every day it just seems to get worse and worse. I am so stressed and depressed, and some times I'll just start crying or getting angry for no real reason, and my emotions are just extremely bipolar because of all this distress.
I have gotten five hours of sleep in the last five days and I hadn't eaten anything since Friday evening, but I ate something earlier today.

Finally, I scheduled an appointment with my school counselor for tomorrow, so that I could tell her what I believed that I am. I was hoping that she could conduct the six week/month long sessions of therapy that is required before you can start taking hormones or anything so they can properly diagnose you with GID (gender identity disorder.)

The only thing is, I've been so stressed that she's going to say no. Our school counselor is a lesbian and I was afraid that she might say, "No, you're not transgender, you're a lesbian, you just need to love yourself and be okay with being gay." or something like that because one of my friends who is bisexual and has been going to the counselor has had the counselor try to convince her she is just lesbian and needs to admit it.
Maybe my friend was just making this up, I don't know.

But right now, this is the only hope I have.

The reason why I want to do this is so that if I come out as being diagnosed with GID, at least I'll have a paper, a form, properly filled out and evaluated by a psychiatrist and to give to my parents so it's more credible to them rather than just my word of mouth.
Something like transgender would just be so hard for them to believe, especially since they have no valid proof other than my word.

Anyway, my question is how should I tell my parents? Should I wait until I (possibly) get the diagnosis and tell them along with handing them the paper? Should I tell them a month before I graduate high school? Or should I tell them during the Summer after I graduate high school?
Or should I just go ahead and tell them right now?

Sore Throat.

If you think you can you can, if you think you can't -- you're right.

Posts: 10 | From: Istanbul, not Constantinople | Registered: Nov 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 35763

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Hi! well this is what i think:
Well first off i dont know how many facts u have and know, and if u have many, u need to have your parents still down and listen to you all the way through, and not let them interupt before you are dont speaking, ik it doesnt seem as easy as it sounds, but i dont think there is a easy way out of this. and it IS a good idea to get it off your chest more sooner then later, because it will just build up over time and it will just get harder and harder to keep everything in. but i dont know your parents or how they deal with things, but this is what i would do. i hope this helps a smidge. .

Live life to the fullest, laugh as much as u can, cry if u need to, and enjoy the people you love as long as forever.

Posts: 15 | From: troubled places | Registered: Nov 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 27966

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[Ashiya, this area is for staff and volunteer responses only. See you on the rest of the boards!]


Posts: 2332 | From: Canada | Registered: Mar 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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