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Shindahoai
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Hi! My girlfiend and i have unprotected sex alot. Because it feels beter. But she hasnt been geting pregnant. This has been going on for about 2 months. Its time of the month to start showing signs of her peroid but the normal pains are ALOT worse then they ever been. still in the same place though. Shes had more of an appetite lately. And shes alot more sexual then she use'd to be. Shes also had abnormal headechs. Are these early signs of being pregnant? Or do you think these are normal for her to have before her peroid? Thanks!
Posts: 11 | From: boca raton fl | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
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Has your girlfriend seen her sexual health clinic or gynecologist recently for a full exam?

If she has NOT, I cannot state enough how important it is she does that:if you two have been having unportected sex, she's been at risk of not just pregnancy, but also sexually transmitted infections, and an increase in menstrual discomfort is something she should have looked into to be sure it is not due to an untreated infection.

Increased libido, cramps and headaches are not a symptoms of early pregnancy. Increased appetite can be. Excepting the cramps, none of the above are typical PMS symptoms.

Are you are your partner prepared to manage a pregnancy? Because I assure you, it's not going to "feel better" for her when and if she becomes pregnant.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 67082 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Shindahoai
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When we met we were both vergins. So there shouldnt be much to worry about with infections? No she hasnt been to a gynecologist yet. But shes turning 18 in like 2 weeks. We were planing to visit one then. And with the cramps they are abnormaly painful. Its not consitant, very rare but when they do come. sometimes she cant even walk.
Posts: 11 | From: boca raton fl | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
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She needs NOT to wait to go. One does not have to be 18 to go to the GYN, and once one becomes sexually active it is VITAL to go once a year, or more often if concerns -- like seriously debilitating menstrual crmaps -- present themselves.

If NEITHER of the two of you had had ANY sexual contact whatsoever (not just intercurse) with partners, that does mean that your STI risks are substantially smaller: it does NOT mean that you have NO risks or NO reason to be concerned with infections.

And one more thing? If she hasn't yet even begun GYN care each year, and I'm not hearing from you that yes, she very much wants to be pregnant, it's pretty safe to say she is NOT prepared to become pregnant. So, you two need to sit down and suss out how you are going to practice birth control. If you need to learn how to use condoms preoperly so that they feel great (which is pretty easy: use the thinnest ones, put a drop of lube inside when putting it on, put lube on the outside), then do that. If, after a period of using them as safer sex the two of you are ready to go without, then you need to find another method of birth control that will work for both of you.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About MeGet our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Shindahoai
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The thing is not that we dont want to go to the gyn, its that we dont want the parents to find out about it. is there a way we can do this as minors with out them knowing?
Posts: 11 | From: boca raton fl | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
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Absolutely: as I believe we informed you a couple months back when you asked about birth control, a gynecologist legally has to keep her information confidential.

So, she can go to a private gynecologist, or to a clinic like Planned Parenthood, whichever works best or she prefers, but in either case, her parents would not be notified.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About MeGet our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Shindahoai
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Oh! ok thanks! around how much does it cost for a exam with one of these gyn or sex clinics? if we didnt use any insurance?
Posts: 11 | From: boca raton fl | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
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It depends.

A private gynecologist visit, with a full STI screening, would likely be a miniumum of around $100, most likely more, especially if she is a new patient.

Clinics like Planned Parenthood, however, usually use a sliding scale system, in which she would be billed based on her income and what she could afford to pay.

Last thing? if you're concerned about how much this would cost, I cannot, for the life of me, figure out why you are NOT concerned about how much a pregnancy, abortion, or childbirth and parenting will cost. So do yourself -- and your partnerm the one who would become pregnant-- a favor. Start using the darn condoms, okay?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About MeGet our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Shindahoai
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Ok thank you for your patience and time. it was much appreciated.
Posts: 11 | From: boca raton fl | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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