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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Ask Scarleteen » Extremely stressed and worried

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Author Topic: Extremely stressed and worried
pinkbunny
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Member # 30328

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Hello there, my situation seems to be somewhat common, but I think i'd feel a lot better if I told my own version, no matter how similar they are to other's on this board.

The problem is, my girlfriend and I, are extremely scared right now, because a couple of times last week, she gave me a blowjob/handjob, and neither of us could remember whether or not I had any residual semen on my hands before I fingered her. We both think that it's not too likely, since I would normally wipe it off straight away, since I find it awkward to have semen on my hands, but, even the slightest chance that this could bring about a pregnancy, is scaring the living daylights out of us.

I myself, have not slept more than an hour a night, for the part week, because I am so incredibly worried and disgusted with myself. The only thing I can do right now is try to gather some information and statistics, and pray to God that this is just a false alarm. If she turns out to be pregnant, then her parents will never let us see eachother again. I feel so stupid not thinking about this before, and now i deeply regret it. If this turns out alright, then I have sworn to myself that we would never do ANYTHING sexual again until we are ready. So I beg of you, please give me some advice and help [Frown] , I'll be needing it.

Oh yes, one thing I forgot to mention, it is currently around 4 to 5 days before her predicted period, and she says that her breasts grew a bit bigger because her bra felt a little bit tighter than usual and she is feeilng a little bloated. Now I know that these could very well be PMS symptoms, but could you guys verify or tell me if it is likely to be PMS symptoms or signs of pregnancy? I would appreciate it very much, Thank you for your time.

Posts: 9 | From: Canada | Registered: Aug 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
dailicious
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Breast growth due to pregnancy will not happen within the first couple weeks of pregnancy. It's more likely they're swelling because she's approaching her period (or heck, my bras have been tight in the past due to plain old water retention).

You don't have a pregnancy risk here, from what you've described, it would just be highly unlikely.

It is VERY sensible of you to hold off on sexual activity again until you know you're both fully prepared, however, that's a very mature decision. Check out some of the articles on the main site, they may give you some ideas and pointers on how to know when you're ready and how to best go about prevent future pregnancy and STI risks.

--------------------
Jean
aka dailicious
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Posts: 3382 | From: Denver, Colorado | Registered: Mar 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
pinkbunny
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Knowing when I am ready does not matter too much to me at the moment, though I do appreciate the compliment. My course of action right now, is to suppress all sexual urges when I am around her, and believe me I can do it. I just really hope that she is not pregnant, I don't care about anything else at the moment. She is the only person in the world that I care about. In our circumstances, which I do not want to reveal as it may be extremely offending towards others, if our parents found out, they would collectively work together and never let us see eachother again. If that happens, I could just die from heartache. I hate how we have to hide everything, but that's just how society is today... . The only thing that is holding me together now, is that I know our love is true. If we were older, and she were pregnant, I would be overjoyed, because we have created a life together, as a loving couple, but right now at this point in time, it could potentially end any future we might have together.

That is what I am scared of most, her being pregnant, and as a result the termination of our relationship. If only our parents would accept us, then to tell you the truth the pregnancy would not be so bad. Please, any further response and information would be incredibly appreciated. Every single night where I should be sleeping, I spend my time crying at the thought of losing her, and it is kind of hard to try and look cheery around other people now.

I'm sorry if I sound like some sort of drama-queen, but it's really how I feel, and unfortunately, this is the only place where I can safely and anonymously express it. [Frown] TT___TT

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dailicious
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That's what we're here for [Smile] don't worry about it.

Honestly, like I said, though, it's just SO SO unlikely that she's pregnant from the situations you were explaining. Just tell yourself that she's NOT pregnant, repeat it in your head if you need to, because it really honestly just isn't a huge possibility at ALL.

It's sort of difficult for us to advise you any further than that, especially if we don't know your situation (which, if you're more cofortable not sharing is fine).

Do you have any trusted adults you could speak to, like a counselor perhaps? That could help with your worries and maybe even perhaps how to handle the situation you're in?

--------------------
Jean
aka dailicious
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pinkbunny
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Well, unfortunately, I have no adults that I can fully trust with this, and to tell you the truth, the counsellors in my area, from what I've see, seem to be pretty useless. In fact my school counsellor a couple of years ago gave the graduating highschool class the wrong information about our university registration requirements and things such as these. I thank you very much for helping me and responding, I really do appreciate it, I'd give you a hug if I could. I'll try and do as you say and try not to be too worried, and I will try to convince myself that she is not pregnant, and hopefully she won't be. She is currently out of the country, with no way to contact me without her parents knowing, which make me worry even more. Sigh... life is unfair, and I have never understood it as much as now. But oh well, I shall try to make the best of it, and if she turns out to not be pregnant, then I shall work hard in order to achieve our dreams. ^__^
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pinkbunny
Neophyte
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YES!!! THIS IS WONDERFUL, she just had her period!!!woooooooot!!! I am sooo freakin relieved, and even though the problem has blown over, I will still hold true to my promises! WOoot!
Posts: 9 | From: Canada | Registered: Aug 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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