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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Ask Scarleteen » I broke my roommate.

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Author Topic: I broke my roommate.
mellygirl
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Okay, here's the situation... I'm a college student and next year I'm leaving the dorms and living with my current roommate, her fiance (soon to be husband) and two of his guy roommates. So the five of us are all really good friends. I've been attracted to one of the guys since, well, since I met him. In October we fooled around (to a very small extent) for like a week, and then jointly decided that we should quit, for fear of getting caught by our roomies and because I was in a complicated relationship with another guy. And we went back to just being really, really good friends... like the kind of friends you always hope for.

But, for the past month, our situation has been escalating. We started spending even more time together, flirted more, cuddled, etc. Two nights ago, when we were the only ones left awake in his room, watching a movie, we both started to get sleepy. So, because there's only one couch, I laid down on top of him... which is not normally a big deal (regardless of the guy). But I could tell he had a boner, and so I looked at him and he kissed me. We fooled around a little bit for about an hour before I went to bed. We also made plans to sneak out the next night to the apartment where we're living next year (I'm living there this summer and have the only key).

So the next night, we decided to shower together (just for info: he knows that I am very experienced, and, with the exception of me now, he's only ever just kissed a girl) and he also wanted to have anal sex with me, which I agreed to... kind of reluctantly. We didn't use a condom (which, I know! is terrible). So while this is going on, he sneezes... real romantic. He gets up to go find a tissue and yells for me in the other room. Right where the head of his penis starts, he was seriously cut and gushing blood. Neither one of us have any idea how it happened, but we know it wasn't there before we had anal sex. After we got cleaned up (it was all over me, too), he told me that he thought it was best to not fool around anymore.

I was crushed. I really don't know what to do now, to keep things from being awkward between us. He is one of the best friends I have, and my new roommate. What do I do?? Also, I really want to know how he got cut. I realize he is probably really embarassed and he won't ever tell anyone else, but I was wondering if he should see a doctor about it. We're being sorta open about the situation, and talked for a few hours after everything happened. So any help on what to do or say would be great.

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*Melanny*

Posts: 175 | From: Midwest US | Registered: Apr 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Bobolink
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Yes, he needs to se a doctor. How long ago was this? He should go to an ER. There is a possibility of infection and serious damage. He should go now.

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I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.

- Galileo

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mellygirl
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Okay. I'll talk to him today about going to see a doctor. I don't know as though he'll actually go (he's really quite shy), but I'll do my very best to convince him he should. Maybe if I offer to go along and explain the situation for him...
Oh, and any ideas how that could have happened, so I can avoid it in the future.

So with that portion settled (being the more important part), what do I do to insure our friendship? He knows how I feel about him now, and things are getting awkward when we're with other people. When it's just the two of us, we're fine though... I just really care about the health of our friendship now and don't want it to be broken too!

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*Melanny*

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mellygirl
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Oh, I forgot to say how long ago. It was Wednesday night / early yesterday morning. He told me last night that it still hurts pretty bad though.

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*Melanny*

Posts: 175 | From: Midwest US | Registered: Apr 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
mellygirl
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Oh, I forgot to say how long ago. It was Wednesday night / early yesterday morning. He told me last night that it still hurts pretty bad though.

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*Melanny*

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likewhoa19
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edit: yikes! sorry! I thought I was in a different forum. need to be more careful

[ 04-28-2006, 03:52 PM: Message edited by: likewhoa19 ]

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logic_grrl
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Likewhoa19, we appreciate that you want to help, but only staff and advocates are allowed to post replies in this forum and "Emergencies & Crises".

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"Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world's grief. Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humbly, now. You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it." - the Talmud

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Bobolink
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This is no time for being shy. He needs medical attention right now!

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I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use.

- Galileo

Posts: 3442 | From: Stirling, Ontario, Canada | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
mellygirl
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I just got what you wrote to me (I've been gone all day) and I talked to Andrew. He doesn't have good health insurance, and the only thing open right now is the ER, so he promised me that he'll go to readycare in the morning, and I'm going with him to explain. ) I know it's not right now, but this is the best I can do. He really can't afford the ER, and neither can I... so morning is really the only option besides nothing. Thanks for the help!

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*Melanny*

Posts: 175 | From: Midwest US | Registered: Apr 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
mellygirl
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We went to the doctor today and they said it looked pretty bad, which it did. So they put him on antibiotics and are going to do a follow up in about a week. They had a hard time telling what was up because there was so much bruising. So, hopefully, it will be all better soon. Thanks so much for your help!

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*Melanny*

Posts: 175 | From: Midwest US | Registered: Apr 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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