Donate Now
  
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Ask Scarleteen » my girlfriend

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: my girlfriend
cooltennis12
Neophyte
Member # 7205

Icon 5 posted      Profile for cooltennis12     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
My girlfriend wants to experience pain and become completely submissive. What are some things we could do?
Posts: 2 | From: Schererville, IN | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ashy
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 4764

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Ashy     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Hi,
I suggest that you read one of our articles:
Working the Kinks Out

Furthermore, we cannot give information on sexual technique. In our guidelines, it is explicitly stated that questions about sexual technique are not permitted:

quote:

Scarleteen cannot and will not answer questions which pertain to sexual technique or illegal activity, and posts which request such material will be closed or deleted, which includes, but is not limited to, such questions and subjects as:

* How to perform specific sexual activities (i.e., "How do I give a blow job?" "What are some new sexual positions?")
* Illegal drug use or drug abuse (including alcohol use under the legal drinking age)
* Illegal or patently unsafe sexual activities (i.e, bestiality, statutory rape, incest, purposefully transmitting disease or infection, etc.)


Only you and your partner can decide what you want in a relationship. Try sitting down with her and discussing the topic with her in order to clear things up. But remember, be very, very careful if you are going to practicing BDSM play.

------------------
Ash
Scarleteen Advocate

"If we treat people as they are, we make them worse. If we treat people as they ought to be, we help them become what they are capable of becoming."
--Goethe


Posts: 1784 | From: USA | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
lemming
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 33

Icon 1 posted      Profile for lemming     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
(oh, and "BDSM" is bondage-domination-sadism (sometimes, "submission")-masochism, a sort of catch-all for some kinds of power play and dominance-submission stuff .)

------------------
~lemming, Scarleteen Advocate

"Years ago, I was an angry young man/I'd pretend that I was a billboard/Standing tall by the side of the road/I fell in love with the beautiful highway..."-Talking Heads, "(Nothing but) Flowers"


Posts: 3156 | From: Austin, Texas | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
kythryne
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 5460

Icon 1 posted      Profile for kythryne     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Also, if you decide to experiment with BDSM play of any sort, it is very important that you mutually pick a "safeword" that either of you can use if things get too intense. Please DO NOT EVEN CONSIDER doing BDSM without a safeword.

A safeword can be anything, as long as it's not something you're likely to normally say during sexual activity. For instance, mine is "asparagus".

Keep in mind too, BDSM is about trust and exploration, not about cruelty or abuse. The article Ashy linked to has some excellent references, and I'd strongly suggest that both of you read up on the issue before beginning any play.

------------------
Kythryne Aisling
Scarleteen Advocate

"The only unnatural sexual act is that which you cannot perform."
-- Alfred Kinsey


Posts: 1685 | From: New York City | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3

Google
Search Scarleteen