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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » EXPERT ADVICE » Ask Scarleteen » Am I THAT bad?

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Author Topic: Am I THAT bad?
Member # 5971

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Me and my boyfriend were together last night, and I started to give him head, after a few minutes I used my hands as well. After about 5 minutes of that he stopped me and jacked-off on his own and ejaculated. Its not like I am not comfortable with him doing that-just am I just majourly doing wrong? Or can he just not get off when its me? Is it me or him or nothing at all? Or what?? Its making me really self concious...what can I do?? If anyone could help me it would be greatly appreciated!

I do not suffer from insanity. I enjoy every moment of it :D

Posts: 10 | From: Canada | Registered: Nov 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 1371

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Unfortunately, since I wasn't present at last night's events, and since my Psychic Boyfriend Powers hat is at the cleaners, I'll have to give you the standard advice of asking your boyfriend what was going on.

It's quite possible that he just felt like masturbating, that he wanted to show you something he enjoyed, that he thought you were getting tired, that he was uncomfortable with you doing it... at any rate, he didn't tell you (which you might want to ask him to do, if this happens again) so you might want to say something like "hey, the other night, when <fill in details> happened, what was going on for you then?" and take it from there.

Hope that helps.


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Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 894

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Of course hon, we can't possibly tell you whether or not you did anything wrong. The absolute best way to find out is to talk to your partner about it- ask him why, or what you could do differently. Find out what HE likes- maybe what you were doing (or how you were doing it) just wasn't working for him. But if the two of you discuss it, he could tell you what he likes, or what went wrong. Communication is a key element in a relationship.

It doesn't necessarily mean that you're "bad". People enjoy and respond differently to different things. But if you really want to find out, the best (and only) way is to ask him.

And of course, you were using proper protection, right (condoms for oral sex, and latex gloves for manual sex)? (I hope so.) Safer sex items make contracting nasty STDs much less likely, and make sex much smoother and safer overall. And truthfully, it is quite possible to catch (and spread) a number of STDs and STIs through oral AND manual sex.

~*Scarleteen Advocate

"Love gives you wings, and it helps you to fly." --Mel Gibson, 'Conspiracy Theory'

Posts: 492 | From: Michigan | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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