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Author Topic: When Your Ex Was Great
Isabel
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Member # 5517

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This isn't a crisis, but I wasn't sure who else to ask. I'm nineteen years old, in my first year of college, and have been sexually active since I was seventeen. I've always enjoyed sex, I almost always come, and I've had about four partners, so I know it's not just one person.
The thing is, though, that for a year I dated one of my best friends, a guy I've known since we were both twelve. The relationship didn't work, and we ended up breaking up while I was visiting him in England. I'd been under the impression, until I came out there, that he was pretty well in love with me, so it was unexpected. I was also having anxiety attacks due to unrelated things, I was on the Pill, and I had to stay with him for a week afterward. End result: I ended up crying and being all weird in front of him.
We're now sort of friends and we're both dating other people. I have two problems, though. One: I really, really, really do not like the way I was at the end of things in England. I /hate/ crying, I hate looking weak. I was dumped once for being too clingy and, though I'm usually quite independent, I'm afraid that if I let go like that--the relationship was very deep and pretty intense--I'll end up humiliating myself again.
Two: this guy and I had more chemistry between us than is in the entire science building here at college. I could just look at him and get turned on, I really adored things like giving him head, etc. I'm *attracted* to the new guy I'm with, and I was attracted to my other boyfriends, and I have or had fun with all of them, but it was never like that. Will it be again with someone else? Should it be?
What I'm really worried about is the chance that I'll never be able to feel that sort of passion without making a fool of myself, or that I'll never be able to feel it again with anyone but him. Help? Please?

Posts: 5 | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
glitter695
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Member # 1515

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You cant force anyone to want to be with you or like you. I know you want to be with him, but he has moved on. Maybe you should have a talk with him about how you feel, maybe he feels the same way, and hes holding it in just like you are.

[quote]I could just look at him and get turned on, I really adored things like giving him head, etc.[quote]

As I read through your post I get the feeing that you only want this guy to have sexual relations with. Is there more to this guy that you like?

So I think that you should have a talk with him, and tell him what you are feeling. A good talk does some good once and awhile. Good Luck.

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*~*~12/3/99*~*
*~*~*~I LOVE YOU BOB FOREVER AND ALWAYS*~*~*~

"Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer, but wish we didn't" -Erica Jong<~~~no thats not me :)

*~*Scarleteen Advocate*~*


Posts: 1978 | From: NY:) | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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