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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Gender Issues » I'm really scared about being bi!

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Author Topic: I'm really scared about being bi!
Member # 35358

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I recently found out that I'm attracted to a girl. But we went out recently and she was being really touchy (stroking my back, hugs, touches, etc) and I really enjoyed it (it gave me "that feeling"). I'm very afraid of being bi-sexual or whatever. I feel like crying because its so confusing. I wish I could talk to someone about it but my family would most definitley NOT support me and only one of my friends i think MIGHT understand. But I'm so embarassed. But I can't help how I feel about her. COuld it just be because I haven't been in a relationship in a long time, and she is showing the love that im craving? Or is it the attraction that makes it different? Are they one in the same? Please help me with a little more insight.
Posts: 13 | From: Sometown, TX | Registered: Oct 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 5375

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Read this.

You've started 6 different threads here but all of them have been very similar. As I explained last time, you are not permitted to post multiple thread on the same topic. If you want more information you can reply with further questions to your original posts.

Please read through the main site -- there's a ton of good information there. The link above is a good place to start. If you still have questions, come back to one of the threads you already started and ask them. Please take the time to use the entire site instead of creating duplicate after duplicate.

I would have girls regard themselves not as adjectives but as nouns. --Elizabeth Cady Stanton

Posts: 3641 | From: Truckee, CA, US | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 35652

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i went through something sort of similiar before i decided i was lez. the only contact of a sexual nature i got was with a male friend and his girlfriend. (sounds strange, i know) the female was a very cuddly person and the guy was just going along. i never realized what i was doing until later, but i always wanted to cuddle with the female, and not the guy. later after they broke up i still cuddeled with the guy. i enjoyed it because it was the only human contact i was getting, at all. while him and i cuddeled something always felt off. later i started craving a soft female body next to me instead of the hard masculin body.
and a while after that it hit me, i like women. the thought terrified me. i am fine with gays, but me gay? i finally got to the point that i am ok with being lez, celebrating it even.
hope the above helped at all.
my advice is enfoy the contact with your female friend. it does not have to lead anywhere sexual. however you sexuality turns out if fine. it does not really change who you are. when you figure thing out it will click.
if you really do not want to be bi, then you don't have to be. do what makes you happy.
no one is 100% hetero of homo. you may well mostly like men and this is one of the few times a women will hold your interest.

hope my story and two cents helped. (disorganized as it all was)

Posts: 6 | From: Durango, Colorado | Registered: Nov 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
plain milyeh
Member # 32511

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it's not really scary being bi (or gay or queer or awesome), i promise! at least, no inherently scarier than being straight. (can't lie: being anything is gonna be terrifying every now and again. hooray for life!)

except the part where you're in the closet. that's way lame.

which is not to say that i think you should go tell everybody you're definitely bisexual, since i realise you're all unsure about it and stuff right now. and hey. maybe you aren't. but. if you are. my advice follows:

this part right now? this part where it's just started to occur to you and now you're like, "oh crud, i gotta deal with all these stupid feelings and figure out what they mean and stuff", and nobody knows, and you're scared about what'll happen if they find out? i remember that part. it was not much fun, i'll grant you that. but also? it gets better after that part. 'cause after that part, there's confidence, and finding out that some of your friends are more accepting than you ever could have imagined, and kissing pretty ladies without feeling all weird and guilty about it, even.

it's good solid stuff.

just keep thinking about it. try to think instead of'll get further that way.

this part will end, if you let it.

[ 11-14-2007, 06:37 PM: Message edited by: plain milyeh ]

Posts: 108 | From: caaaaanada. ('cause we've got rocks and trees and trees and rocks...) | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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