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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Safer Sex & Birth Control » depression after orgasm

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Author Topic: depression after orgasm
Member # 24176

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I don't really know what is wrong with me. When I was with my boyfriend we decided to take it to the next level and started having oral sex. I was suprised at how much I actually enjoyed it, and I actually did have an orgasm many times. The only thing is is that right after, I mean immediatly, after I would orgasm I would feel this huge wave of this depression like feeling come over me. I just wanted to curl up and go to sleep and I wanted to stop in all sexual activity whatsoever. I don't know why, it is like I couldn't control it. Is this normal, or is ther something else causing it? I know that I will become sexually active with my current boyfriend, and I don't want this to hinder our relationship. I am a little worried to do anything with him for fear that this might return again.
Posts: 3 | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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ok, so I'm not exactly the biggest expert (or anywhere NEAR an expert) on this subject... But what I think you are feeling is a huge relaxation of the muscles in your body. When you orgasm, your muscles (specifically the ones in your pelvic region) contract, and then release as you come. So maybe it's depression, but just your body coming down off that high. Also, I don't think that there's anything wrong with you, it's just the way that you experience an orgasm.

Hope that helped!


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Posts: 3 | From: AZ | Registered: Apr 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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It's not just about muscles, either.

The larger issue is that when orgasm causes chemical changes in the body, releasing endorphins -- which are basically nature's sedatives -- oxytocin, and dopamine levels also drop. In short, you're dealing with a significant chemical change that usually makes a person feel sleepy, very relaxed, and sometimes, kind of emotionally clingy.

None of those things are depression, but they can feel kind of heavy.

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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i think its hard for people to understand what this_girl05 is talking about if you haven't experienced it yourself. i feel the same way. i have depression after i orgasm, right away. its not simply a heavy feeling that the two of us are mistaking for depression (at least, speaking for myself, its not). it is depression.

the chemical changes that the body goes through after an orgasm are known to not only make someone relaxed, but to give their mood a boost. sex, laughter, and exercise are all prescribed by some doctors to help treat depression because the affects are often as potent as an antidepressant.

so this question interests me as well. why would sex have the opposite affect and cause depression in someone?

if i'm not mistaken, there is a term for this phenomenon. i think its called post orgasmic depression. not sure though. i tried researching it a while back, but i haven't been able to find out much.

this_girl05, you didn't mention how often you had sex with your boyfriend, but in my experience, the depression doesn't happen every time. i'm 26, i've been with my fiance for 6, almost 7, years. from the beginning, its been unclear how i would feel afterward. my fiance and i work through it though. [Smile]

[ 08-19-2008, 09:04 PM: Message edited by: jennymac ]

Posts: 1 | From: lex, ky | Registered: Aug 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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