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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Safer Sex & Birth Control » Safe sex initiation/introduction

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Author Topic: Safe sex initiation/introduction
Casey12345
Neophyte
Member # 32018

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We all know that condoms can only go so far. But they seem to be the only main stream and widely acceptable form of protection. Dental dams and latex gloves seem like odd ball practices. I would feel better about sex using these things but have no idea how to bring it up without scaring her off or ruining a mood. I still want it to be intimate and not like its a surgery or something, but safe. I also don't want to scare her away with my "bizarre" practices. What are some good ways to introduce this stuff in the heat of the moment, or at an other time? Or are dental dams and gloves more of a wide spread and common place practice than I perceive? I just don't want the "What the hell are you doing!" face.
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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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You know, it really depends on who you run with and -- in my experience -- how you present the issue.

Personally, I've found that when you don't think of or present safer sex as "oddball" to partners, it often isn't received that way, either.

As with anything new you're bringing to the table sexually, how to do it depends a lot on the dynamic of your relationship. For one couple, for instance, bringing it with humour while in the heat of the moment might be best, while for another, having more sensitive discussion outside the bedroom might be best. Not knowing the ins and outs and general dynamics of your realtionship particularly, it's tough to say how will work best for you.

(FYI? Safer sex has never felt like surgery to me. Think about it this way: whether we're talking about birth control pills or dental dams, these are all part of the practical parts of sex. Sure, they're not super-sexy in romance-novel ways, but you know, this stuff is part of sex: some of sex is practical, whether that's protecting yourself so you can have a good time and get to the super-sexy stuff, or worrying about it when you don't which inhibits you really feeling the super-sexy stuff.)

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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