I just rented The Pillow Book and The Lover and they are both fine films about asians in relationships with white people.
The Pillow Book stars Ewan McGregor (meow!) and Vivian Wu. Vivian's character Nagiko has a strange fetish for body painting calligraphy which stems from her quasi-Oedipal relationship to her father, a writer-calligrapher. Nagiko's father endures some hardships from his publisher, and it's this hatred of the publisher than keeps Nagiko going. Interesting film, you need to see it a few times to really understand it. Very intricate and visually compelling. Interesting cinematography, use of color and picture-in-picture insets. Excellent soundtrack. Directed by Peter Greenaway, 1997.
The Lover is an intersting film about a French schoolgirl and her affair with a Chinese man in colonial Vietnam (Indochina) in the 1930's. Stars Tony Leung, 1992. Very similar to Lolita, but with the added taboos of racism. And it has the interesting twist where the Chinese man is very wealthy, but the French family is penniless. As a person studying Southeast Asia, it really piqued my interest -- the story piqued my interest, not the explicit sex.
That's the other thing about these movies, they both are very sexually explicit (great eroticism in both, imho), and have no MPAA ratings. They may also be harder to find since they're not your average box-office boffo like Jurassic Park or Star Wars.
if anyone else has any good movie reviews about interracial relationships, do reply! Examples: West Side Story, Snow Falling on Cedars, etc.
i use angst