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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » How do you have sex?

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Author Topic: How do you have sex?
shaycay
Neophyte
Member # 107740

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I know this sounds silly but I literally am not sure how to "have sex"? Im a virgin so I have never had sex and I want to be somewhat prepared. What are the basics?

For example, people say to make noise (moan, etc) but I want things to seem natural and not forced. Also, how do I interact and not just lay there like a dead fish? I don't know if I'm comfortable being on top my first time since Im not experienced.

I feel really silly even asking but it's something my friends get weird about when I bring up the subject since I'm waiting until marriage but would like to know now.

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Welcome to the boards, shaycay. [Smile]

There isn't "a way" to engage in sex. There are, instead, nearly infinite possibilities and experiences when it comes to all the kinds of sex we can engage in, how we engage in them at any given time, and how we experience them.

people don't tend to "lay there like a dead fish" when they are enjoying themselves and their partner, and want to be sexual with that person in the way they're being sexual.

But sounds like you have a lot of questions, really stemming from some bare basics. So, why don't you read a couple things to get you started first, and then we can take it from there with questions you have?

I'd suggest getting started with these three:
What's Sex?
Ready or Not? The Scarleteen Sex Readiness Checklist
Driver's Ed for the Sexual Superhighway: Navigating Consent

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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