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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » anal sex

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Author Topic: anal sex
kamille
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Member # 42270

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Hi,

After a night of drinking, I had sex using a condom with a friend. After he had ejaculated and took the condom off, we continued to make out and touch one another. Then we had anal sex and I bled. A lot. We didn't use lubricant and it was my first time having it. What can I do to ensure that my anus heals quickly? Would you suggest taking Plan B? I don't know if he ejaculated after the anal sex, but I know it wasn't inside of me.

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Saffron Raymie
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Anal sex always carries a low risk of pregnancy, so if you don't feel okay with having a low risk, Plan B can reduce that risk.

Anal sex also presents STI risks, so it's best to be fully tested.

If you're having any pain, or still bleeding at all, I'd get to a doctor a.s.a.p (don't worry about telling the doctor you've had anal intercourse, any professional doctor will have heard these things a million times before and won't bat an eyelid). Apart from that, refraining from any more anal play for a little while and being very gentle with yourself - getting plenty of rest and drinking plenty of water - will help any mirco tears inside your anus to heal.

How are you feeling about this, emotionally?

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'Obtain the virgin's consent before you marry her' - Prophet Mohammad (pbuh)

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kamille
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When would you suggest that I go get tested? The last time I was tested would probably be 6 months ago after my last partner.

As per the Plan B -- we had sex with a condom, then he took it off and after a little fooling around we had anal sex. So what I'd be worried about here is residual semen. He didn't come during the anal.

I'm not bleeding anymore, however, when I had a bowel movement yesterday afternoon I did bleed a little. I haven't been to the bathroom since then. I think that I'll talk to the doctor about it when I go get a check up and tests.

Emotionally, I felt pretty okay about it. Then when I was at work yesterday I started to get really anxious and felt sick. I remember that when my partner noticed the blood he kind of freaked out and I went to go wash it off, and then he went to go wash himself off and then when we were both back in bed he wasn't being totally coherent (English isn't his first language), and when I asked him what was wrong he just shook his head and said something about the blood like I made you bleed or that he was bleeding or something.

I'm not really sure what to say at the moment. I would like to talk to my partner about it, to see how he's doing emotionally, but I'm not sure how to bring it up or what to say. We had both decided that it was a slip in our judgement to have anal sex that night. I'd just like to make sure he's not feeling any guilt or shame etc.

[ 06-17-2012, 03:26 PM: Message edited by: kamille ]

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Robin Lee
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HI kamille,

It's good to hear that the bleeding has stopped, though not surprising that there was a little bit of bleeding after your bowel movement. The anal tissues are pretty delicate and do take time to heal after a tear. If you do want to try anal sex again, using lots of lube and making sure you go slowly will usually prevent that kind of tearing.

With discussing sexual issues with a partner, it's often helpful to start the conversation at a time when yu're not engaging in, or planning to engage in, sexual activity. It's also helpful to have these kinds of discussions when you're alone together and can be reasonably sure that you're not going to be interrupted.

You might find the information in this article helpful in terms of how to have a conversation about sex.

Be a Blabbermouth! The Whats, Whys and Hows of Talking About Sex With a Partner

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Robin

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kamille
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Okay, so when would be a good time to go for a check up/tests? And I'm currently on the 21st day of my cycle - I usually get my period every 35 days. I guess it's now been about three days since the event.

[ 06-18-2012, 01:28 PM: Message edited by: kamille ]

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Robin Lee
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STI testing can be done any time, though SOME STIs don't show up right away, sometimes taking as long as 90 days to show up. So, if you haven't been tested recently, it's probably a good idea to go get tested soon, then retest in about three months time.

A pregnancy test can be considered accurate 14 or more days after the risk occurred.

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Robin

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