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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » I guess my wife has syphilis

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Author Topic: I guess my wife has syphilis
Member # 95928

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I beg your pardon, as I would like to be anonymous for everybody now. I did particular strategy as regards testing my spouse's health state without her knowing. You know, nearly a week back my spouse cheated me along with her colleague from work. However I pardoned my girl. because I adore her so much.
Recently I have been reading my online mail and amongst letters there was an editorial on betrayal. It had plan to test a lover for Sexually transmitted diseases in this event.
What can you assume, will the site suit meant for my plans? Possibly, does someone undergo the identical experience? Assist me, i beg you.

Posts: 1 | Registered: Jun 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 25425

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Have you talked to your partner about this at all? Have you asked her about the e-mail that you found and given her a chance to explain?

We really can't condone you going behind her back to order STI tests for your partner, especially on an assumption like that.

If your partner did break your monogamy agreement, then that sucks, of course. But that is something that you need to discuss with her. Once that is sorted out, you can bring up the question of STI testing.

(Should she/you decide to get tested, make sure to get a full panel, rather than just testing for syphilis. Too, you will also want to wait a couple of months until any STIs will show up in a test.)

Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

Posts: 9192 | From: Cologne, Germany | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Just an FYI, you may have been being fascetious, but I'm not sure why you'd guess that your wife has syphilis.

Like Joey suggested, the best plan here is for you two, for now, to work on working through the emotional part of this in your relationship.

Per sexual safety, for the next six months, especially if she engaged in unprotected sex, you'll want to use barriers, like condoms, to protect yourself. You two can talk so she can arrange one STI test in the next month or so, then a second in six months, and if that second one comes back clear, and you two want to talk about going without condoms for genital sex, then you can and can know your risks will be very low if her penal did come back clear.

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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