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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » A problem with my libido...

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Author Topic: A problem with my libido...
Member # 72069

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I have a problem with my libido: it's practically nonexistent. For some background, I have no sexual experience save for a few masturbatory explorations, which proved to naturally be quite pleasurable.

For some reason, in the past few months, I haven't been able to orgasm; I try to masturbate, but I end up getting frustrated and stop. My old fantasies no longer work. I've stopped trying to force it.

It's been a long while since I've felt good and properly horny; I only seem to feel horny when Im on my period, and then I can't really do anything about it. Is there something wrong with me? Is this normal? It's rather worrying me...

Posts: 2 | Registered: Jul 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
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Our libido is not always constant, but it can come and go over the course of our lifetime. Sometimes there is a reason for that (increased stress, medication, big life changes, etc), sometimes there isn't.

Scarleteen Volunteer

"The question is not who will let me, but who is going to stop me." -Ayn Rand

Posts: 9192 | From: Cologne, Germany | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 29754

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Also, as far as I know, there's nothing harmful about masturbating while menstruating (your own blood is not going to be harmful to you, and some women I know say it helps relieve their menstrual cramping). If your concern is about staining bedsheets, carpeting, furniture coverings, etc., you might consider masturbating on the toilet or in the shower, if that works for you, or positioning yourself over something easily washable and absorbent, like a towel, if you do wish to masturbate while you're feeling horny during your period.

As September said, libidos can change over time, sometimes with an identifiable cause, and sometimes not. There's no rule that says that anyone has to want sex at any particular time or with any particular frequency (or if there is, it's a bad rule). If you feel like it's becoming a big problem for you, you might want to see a doctor and get checked for medical conditions that can cause lower-than-is-normal-for-you testosterone levels, as this can sometimes cause a loss of libido, but honestly, I don't think you need to worry, as fluctuations in libido are perfectly normal.

Robble Robble Robble!

Posts: 46 | From: Milwaukee, WI USA | Registered: Jul 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 72069

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Johann7, the very reason I am worried about masturbating while menstruating is that I'm afraid it might hurt, since I already have pretty bad cramps...

Thank you for your replies!

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Executive Director & Founder
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Masturbation usually helps with menstrual cramps, rather than making them worse. All the more so when someone reaches orgasm, but even when that doesn't happen, it usually tends to help.

So, why not give that a shot? It sounds like that is when you most want to, and you might wind up finding a very pleasant way to ease your menstrual symptoms, to boot!

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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