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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » I'm a Lesbian. How can I protect my partner!

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Author Topic: I'm a Lesbian. How can I protect my partner!
xxKristii17
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Member # 62155

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I had herpes (HSV-1) for most of my life and never suffered an outbreak for most of my teen years which had lead me to forgetting about the virus I contracted when a child.

However, I am recently recovering from an outbreak--mainly a cold sore--and am a bit worried for my partners safety when it comes to making love. We have been sexually active with each other for 4 months, have been tested for all STDs (except herpes) and they have came back positive. I am worried because I do not want to transmit the virus to my or her genital region (I know we took a lot of risks with unprotected oral sex). *My partner was tested for herpes and it came back negative.*

We restrained from sexual activity during the outbreak (I wouldn't even kiss her on the cheek) and since the scabs have cleared up, I am wondering when it will be okay to resume kissing each other.

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I love you Steph. <3

Posts: 53 | From: Halifax | Registered: Apr 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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The highest risk of HSV transmission is when there is an active sore or one coming on (which can usually be felt by a tingling sensation in the area). After sores have cleared up, there is still some risk, but it is generally considered very low.

So, with kidding, if your sore cleared up, the risk of passing it on that way is probably very low now. With something like oral sex, you just want to use a barrier method, and ideally, not just when you have an outbreak (at which time the better bet is just to skip any contact with your mouth altogether).

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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xxKristii17
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Member # 62155

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Thank you for replying.

My partner and I have not used any protection and I am worried that I may have infected my or her genital region with HSV-1 (which I read can cause herpes below the waist). I also touched myself in the prodome stage (I didn't know I was getting a cold sore).

I am wondering, if we use dental dams, will we be safer?

--------------------
I love you Steph. <3

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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Using latex barriers for any oral, vaginal or anal sex is ALWAYS safer than not, by a minimum of 70% with infections like HSV.

What's happened or not in the past isn't anything you can do anything about now. All you can do is establish new habits moving forward.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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xxKristii17
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I know. How likely is it that I infected myself with genital herpes? .. I keep having severe anxiety about it.

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I love you Steph. <3

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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I couldn't possibly tell you that. Oral HSV acquired genitally is far less common than genital HSV acquired genitally.

But who you'll need to talk to about this is your healthcare provider, who you may also want to talk to about your issues with anxiety.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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xxKristii17
Activist
Member # 62155

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I heard most cases of genital herpes are caused more by HSV-1 rather than HSV-2. :S

But I guess as long as I took precaution after finding out it was a cold sore, I should be fine. Before It formed into a cold sore, it was a pimple and I scratched it. I only touched myself once I believe (on the vulva) so the chances are probably slim to none? ..

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I love you Steph. <3

Posts: 53 | From: Halifax | Registered: Apr 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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