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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » No hymen?

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Author Topic: No hymen?
tbelle
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So, I had sex for the first time last month. Most people say that something will be 'popped' and you will feel a sudden surge of pain, and then you will bleed. This never happened to me. I felt a lot of pain as I was being stretched out. But nothing 'broke' and I did not bleed.

Recently we had sex again and this time we were a LOT more aggressive. He penetrated me completely and it didn't hurt as much as the last time. Although, it did hurt a lot when he went in very deep. But I still haven't bled at all. Does this mean that his penis is not large enough to break the hymen or is it because I don't have a hymen at all?

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tbelle
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Also, I have another question if that's okay.

While we were having sex/intercourse, his penis would frequently slip out completely by accident, and then he'd have to penetrate me again. I'm not sure if it's because he wasn't hard enough, or if my vagina muscles are just 'tight'. What are some possible reasons for this? Is this normal?

Note: we were using a condom (the kind that are already lubricated) at all times. We didn't use any extra lube.

Could more lube cause the penis to 'slip out'? Or would not enough lube do that?

[ 02-13-2011, 11:13 AM: Message edited by: tbelle ]

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Heather
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That's not an unusual thing to have happen, and can happen because of lack of a full erection, lack of full arousal on your part (and thus, his inability to go inside a bit more deeply), or just a position that isn't working for people.

However, the not using extra lube bit caught my eyes, because if I recall correctly, you've had some condom failures. Not using extra lube could be why, so you may want to add that regardless.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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skiesofgreen
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[whoops, Heather got there first, but here's an extra article that might help you with you first question]

http://www.scarleteen.com/article/body/my_corona_the_anatomy_formerly_known_as_the_hymen_the_myths_that_surround_it

[ 02-13-2011, 12:47 PM: Message edited by: skiesofgreen ]

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Heather
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On what "most people" will say about the hymen: most people are highly uneducated about the corona/hymen and first time intercourse. There is no popping that occurs (unless someone gets injured) and most women do not bleed with first intercourse. These things are myths or misnomers.

The vaginal corona is usually very thing, flexible tissue just inside the vaginal opening that wears away gradually over time, even for people who never have vaginal intercourse.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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tbelle
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Wow, I read the article that skiesofgreen posted. That is very interesting.
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tbelle
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In reply to Heather:

I don't think we've ever had a condom failure before. They've never slipped off or broken apart or anything.

If you don't use extra lube, are the chances of a condom breaking very high? This hasn't happened yet...so I never really worried about it.

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Heather
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I'm sorry, I thought your pregnancy scares had something to do with condom misuse.

But yes: lack of adequate lubrication is associated with condom breakage.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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