Donate Now
Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | register | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Guilt after masturbation

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Guilt after masturbation
punkchique
Neophyte
Member # 46869

Icon 1 posted      Profile for punkchique     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I'm a girl, I'm sexually active and I enjoy masturbating. My problem is that I grew up in a semi-conservative community and my friends looked down on anyone who was sexually active and would say how masturbation was gross.
So now after I orgasm I immediately get a sense of guilt. And when I go to wash my hands I can't even look at myself in the mirror.
How do I get over this feeling? I've tried telling myself over and over that its normal but that never works. [Frown]

Posts: 3 | From: Michigan | Registered: Apr 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
peterg
Activist
Member # 46581

Icon 1 posted      Profile for peterg     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Well, I'm a guy, and when I first started masturbating, back in januray, I did feel some guilt. but after I started doing it for awhile, I got kinda use to it. I still feel a little guilt, but masturbation is a great way to learn about what pleases you, and what you like.
Posts: 176 | From: USA | Registered: Apr 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gingerbread
Activist
Member # 45944

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Gingerbread     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
You should never feel guilty about something that makes you feel good. Do you feel guilty after eating your favorite food, listen to your favorite song, or do other things that make you happy? I sure hope not! Think of masturbation as just another of those favorite things. Something that relaxes you, and makes you feel good. And helps you get to know your body, so that you can be an informed partner later. You're just taking care of yourself and your body, just like if you were exercising, and that is nothing to be ashamed of.
Posts: 44 | From: United States | Registered: Feb 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Hudman
Neophyte
Member # 46911

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Hudman     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
These feelings of guilt indicate that you need an outlet to verbalize your feelings about the situation; either to your parents, a friend, or even your priest. That is a very common feeling. While in some cases it's the result of religious convictions, more likely it's the natural result of the way we're brought up, in addition to actual scientific and biological hormonal reasons.

[ 05-03-2010, 12:07 PM: Message edited by: orca ]

Posts: 4 | From: Alabama | Registered: May 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Jill2000Plus
Activist
Member # 41657

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Jill2000Plus     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
It's your body and there's nothing wrong with you enjoying it, keep reminding yourself that there's nothing wrong with it and there's a good chance your thoughts will change. Remember that you matter and that it's good for you to have pleasure.

Hudman, I don't know of any solid study proving that we have a genetic tendency to feel guilt after masturbation, whether because we are of one particular gender or because we are of this species.

--------------------
Always knock before entering my room when I am in there alone, as I may be doing all sorts of wonderfully thrilling things that I'd rather you didn't see.

Posts: 840 | From: UK | Registered: Dec 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
punkchique
Neophyte
Member # 46869

Icon 1 posted      Profile for punkchique     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Thanks for all the advice guys [Big Grin]

@Hudman, I think it has a lot to do with the way I was brought up. But about what you said with it being genetic, I've always wondered if my guilt had to do with some kind of hormone or endorphin or some kind of chemical release that just made everything feel wrong in my brain. Is that possible?

Posts: 3 | From: Michigan | Registered: Apr 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Guilt isn't chemical or genetic, it's a learned behavior/thought pattern.

However, after orgasm or even during any kind of sex -- including masturbation -- we can certainly tend to be more emotionally open and vulnerable, and chemically tend to be both more relaxed (post-orgasm) or high-hey (before/during), so feelings like guilt can hit harder.

[ 05-03-2010, 09:00 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About MeGet our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 67924 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

Quick Reply
Message:

HTML is not enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.

Instant Graemlins
   


Post New Topic  New Poll  Post A Reply Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3