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» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Getting Kinky?

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Author Topic: Getting Kinky?
vixenchic42
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So spanking has always been a fantasy of mine, as long as I can remember having fantasies about anything. I've never really told anyone about it, but I have done a little self-spanking with masturbation and really enjoyed it. It's not really something I've shared before, and I hadn't talked to my boyfriend about it. I definitely didn't think it would be something that he wanted to do, and that was completely fine with me. I'm alright keeping that for part of my solo runs for now. But lately, when we're having fun, he's started to very lightly slap my bum. He's done it several times, and from the way that he does it, I think he might actually share that particular fantasy. So I want to let him know that he can go for it, that he doesn't need to worry about hurting me, or about doing something that I'm not ready for, because he's always been very respectful about all of that, and he's always wanted to be sure that he's not hurting me and that I'm ok with everything.

The thing is, I'm not really sure how to bring it up. It's not exactly your every day "How's the weather" kind of conversation, and I get a little giggly just thinking about the conversation. (A little silly for a grown woman, I know, but something about the "fantasies talk" just gets me blushing and giggly)

Does anyone have any good conversation starters or ways of bringing it up that's pretty light and casual but that lets him know loud and clear that I'm up for whatever he wants to do?

Thanks so very much!! You guys always have the best advice [Big Grin]

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vixenchic42
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Also, If I am mistaken, and it's not something that he's personally into, I don't want to put alot of pressure on him. I don't want him to think that it's the only way that he can please me or anything.

Thanks again guys!!!

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stupidbf
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Next time he does it you could react with more pleasure. Show him you really enjoy it and go along with it. Don't just brush it off. He may be testing the waters.
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orca
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You know, I think now would be a good time to start getting into the habit of talking openly with your partners about what you do and don't enjoy sexually. I think it would be best to have this conversation when you aren't having sex, though, as it can be more difficult to really express yourself fully during sex.

You could just say, "Hey, I liked it when you were spanking me and I was wondering if that is something you are into as well and if we could start doing that when we have sex." Then you just take it from there.

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Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.--Monty Python and the Holy Grail

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orca
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Member # 33665

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Also, check this article out.

Be a Blabbermouth! The Whats, Whys and Hows of Talking About Sex With a Partner

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Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.--Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Posts: 2726 | From: North America | Registered: Apr 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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