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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » really big sex problems... but only recently

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Author Topic: really big sex problems... but only recently
Member # 35840

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Me and my girlfriend enjoyed a really good sex life for a while, then she got the implant and it sent her periods hay-wire so we could hardly have sex and when we did it wasnt very good for her because she was on a permanent period. This made us stop having sex for a good 3 months and then the doctor sorted it out. Things started to get really good again. But lately i cannot perform, i cum literally as soon as i have entered her vagina, it never used to be like this. Before i could last atleast 10-15 mins sometimes like 30-40 depending on my mood. I would sometimes get a lil over excited and cum in 2 mins but im very excitable and i am usually ready to go again in 5 mins. Lately, like i said, i cum straight away and the more it happens the worse it gets... its getting to the point where i dont want to have sex, i even lost my hard on the other night and couldnt get it back and usually its the complete opposite, i can usually cum and not even loose my hard on. I think this could have something to do with my life affairs atm. I see myself as a waster, im no good and i cant do anything and with good reason. Ever since grandma died last year its been down hill, i ****ed up college and came out with nothing, relationships are ******* up left right and center, ive lost my job, i take drugs and i smoke a **** loads of marijuana every day (like 5 or 6 spliffs a day) She recently told me it was a problem and since then its got about 10x worse. I dont want to be this person any more, i feel suicidally depressed and if nothing changes soon in regards to everything im scared i might do something really stupid, the other night after prematurely ejaculating and seeing the look on her face i took mum's sleeping tablets and went and sat in my car trying to get the guts to do it but tbh im not even man enough to do that. I dont want to loose her and i dont want to break her heart by hurting myself, i love her more than anything in the world... shes the only good thing in my life at the moment and i cant bare to loose her. Just any help or suggestions would be so helpful im really at the end of my tether
Posts: 1 | From: England | Registered: Nov 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Oh, hon, sorry you're going through such a rough time right now - and first thing that sticks out first - is there anyone you can go to (preferably someone unbiased in your life, such as a counselor or doctor) to help you stop using drugs? I'm sure you know this, though it can be hard to sort out on your own, but drug use of any kind can be a huge drain on your mental and physical health; it's likely they're not only causing your depression to worsen, but also likely causing some physical troubles as well.

For now, I'd really recommend you take a break from sexual activity, especially if it's taking a toll on you if you ejaculate early on in activity (or, at the very least, try to work with your girlfriend to draw the focus off intercourse - there are a lot of other activities you can participate in that don't need to involve an erection whatsoever).

I'm sounding a bit like a broken record, but do you have a counselor or a doctor you could go to about the depression and drug use? That really strikes me as the absolute first step in helping you get to a place where you're happy and feeling in control of your life, hon.

Also, I don't know how much it helps, but I don't believe anyone in this whole world is a "waster" - everyone has potential and a place and everyone can utilize that as long as they're in the right space.

Is there any way we can help you out more? Possibly in terms of finding a doctor or any other resources in your area?

aka dailicious
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Posts: 3382 | From: Denver, Colorado | Registered: Mar 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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