hmmm okay i have some questions about things me and my boyfriend have done and what we are thinking of doing. ok so last time we were together he fingered me and all it felt like was a bit of pain it didnt feel good and i didnt orgasm whats wrong? what do you have to do? second of all i have no idea how to give a handjob or a blowjob....any tips? third of all he says he wants to do oral on me...im kinda scared....any tips?
both me and him havent done anything like this before so we dont knwo what the hell we are doing and need advice.
Posts: 2 | From: minneapolis | Registered: Sep 2006
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Scarleteen doesn't give tips on how to perform sexual activities, so really all you're going to hear here is to only do stuff you're comfortable with, and not to feel pressure to do anything you're not comfortable with.
-------------------- amawesome - (adj.) a combination of 'amazing' and 'awesome,' usually by someone who has tied on a few too many. Ex: No, dude, listen! I like, luv ya man! I mean, you're like, amawesome! Posts: 65 | From: Colorado Springs, CO | Registered: Mar 2006
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Okay, you felt some pain when your boyfriend fingered you. I can't tell you the reason why since there are multiple causes. Were you tensed ? Did he go slowly ? Were you using enough lubricantion, were you fully aroused ? Those can all be reasons why this hurt.
You said you didn't orgasm nor did it felt good. Vaginal sex most of the time in women is not enough alone to bring pleasure. It's more clitoral stimulation that works best in most women or a mix of both. Why ? Because there aren't a lot of nerve endings in the vagina.
Just know also that your pleasure depends on a lot of things. It's just doesn't only have something physical to do it also have something to do with your brain. So if you're constantly thinking about something else let's say fear your mind can't concentrate on the feelings you are getting and it makes it difficult to ressent anything.
Also, thinking constantly about wanting to reach orgasm doesn't help. Instead, it makes it even harder to reach it. So relax, orgasming is not really that important. What is the most important is the process of sex, it can be as much enjoyable as getting an orgasm sometimes.
Second, as other have told you we can't give tips here. You can always do some search but I'd say experiment. This could be quite an enjoyable experience. Just tell your partner this is something you have never done and that it is your first time trying it. He'll understand.
As for being scared on getting oral sex from your boyfriend, this might be a sign that you are not quite ready. First you said your boyfriend wanted to try oral sex on you. YOU, how do YOU feel about it ? Do you also want to try it ? If not, then there's really no reason to. Only do it if this is something you want to do. If this is not, just tell your partner and a good partner should respect your decision.
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