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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Horny

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Author Topic: Horny
Matt-Trivium
Neophyte
Member # 26708

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basically.....i do get horny alot and in a average week i probably masterbate 4 or 5 times.
and i do find myself wanting sex all the time quite alot.
me and my girlfriend have sex occationally, like once every month or longer as she wants to cut down.
she thinks that my habit of masterbating is getting obsessive and i do it too much.
is there anyway i could help myself to cut down on masterbating and to stop being horny alot of the time???
thanks x

[ 08-26-2006, 04:06 PM: Message edited by: Matt-Trivium ]

Posts: 12 | From: England | Registered: Dec 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
-Lauren-
Activist
Member # 25983

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Just as long as you're respecting your girlfriend's boundaries and keeping your activities to yourself, there's no harm in it. There is no cure for a high sex drive, but masturbation is a good way to keep it under control.
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Matt-Trivium
Neophyte
Member # 26708

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i do respect them, we only do things together when she feels like she wants to, i never force her to do anything.
thanks for your help.
x

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Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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Since, given your IPs, you and your girlfriend are using the same computer, have you checked out my answers to her this afternoon?

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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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thathollygirl
Activist
Member # 29912

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Four or five times? That's not obsessive, especially for a teenager. I often masturbate that often, and everybody knows chicks have lower sex drives! (NOT--that's an absolute lie--sex drive is a personal thing and has nothing to do with gender)

I don't think this is at all anything to worry about. I did have a boyfriend with a seriously messed-up sex drive, and believe me, this is not it. So long as, like you said, you're not pressuring anybody else to satisfy your urges, wank to your heart's content.

Have fun!

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Mr. Matthew
Activist
Member # 29890

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Matt,

Miz Scarlet gave you and your friend good advice, and I could leave it at that, but since I'm a man I wanted add my assurance that you are completely normal. Getting horny a lot and masturbating a lot is fine for you. It's more than fine, it's pleasureable. Masturbating as you do, and more, is common. There is a large range of frequency among people.

Masturbating a lot has no negative physical effects and may have positive physical effects, and if you don't feel guilty or have stress because of how others view your pleasuring yourself then it has no negative and many positive psychological effects.

If others, like your partner, don't feel the way you do then it may be hard for them to understand the frequent and powerful desires many men, and many women, have and the compulsion to find sexual release. I'm not comfortable with self denial unless there is good reason for it. Whether there is good reason you have to decide.

As far as your drive, and its effect on your relationship, this can create difficulties. Sometimes a partner feels neglected. Sometimes a partner thinks you are being unhealthfully obsessive. Talk about it together, as you are. Perhaps a solution is to find private times to masturbate and you and your partner can adopt a don't ask don't tell policy.

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kluekozyte
Activist
Member # 29511

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Forgive me if it is not my place to say this, but it seems to me that your girlfriend has no right or basis to accuse you of being obsessively sexual (as long as, as everyone else has said, no one's pressuring anybody to have sex when they don't want to). Just as you need to respect the fact that she has different sexual needs than you do, she needs to respect you and your level of sexual desire.
Posts: 84 | From: NY | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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