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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Doesnt consider it sex?

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Author Topic: Doesnt consider it sex?
CJHNpantherspirit23
Neophyte
Member # 28121

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OK, So Friday night ..me and a bunch of friends.
And a guy who..im not going out with because theres too much drama and we still wanna be friends.

But we always do stuff together and its basically like were going out , but were not.

Well this past friday we all got drunk...and me and him ended up having sex. But really all he did was barely got it in , because it hurt waaaaay to bad, so basically all he did was penatrate me.(were both virgins)..but we were both drunk.

Well he told one of his good friends the next day , that we didnt even have sex because he didnt cum.

That bothers me. Is what what we did not considered sex? Idk, how to talk to him about this?

Also he said he doesnt want to go out because, it causes too much drama? Weve already started something that neither one of us will forget, I think not going out will just make things harder.

Posts: 21 | From: Arkansas | Registered: Mar 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
LilBlueSmurf
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I would consider what you two had as intercourse. As such, you have a pregnancy and you both have STI risks, if you did not use a condom. If did not use protection and you do not wish to become pregnant, you need to get Emergency Contraception. You'll also require STI testing in a month or so.

I'm not sure why you care so much what he considers sex ...? I would be more concerned that he's talking to other people about it at all, rather than what he thinks 'sex counts as'.

As for whether he wants to go out after this ... Well, frankly, you should have thought of this before you had sex with him. Just because you had sex does not mean you are compatible to date, or even remain friends. If you need to be in a stable relationship to be comfortable having sex, you need to start the stable relationship before engaging in sex.

[ 03-27-2006, 03:34 PM: Message edited by: LilBlueSmurf ]

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CJHNpantherspirit23
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whats STI...neither one of us have ever had sex before. and we used a condom. and im only 14 wouldnt that require me telling my parents.

[ 03-27-2006, 03:58 PM: Message edited by: CJHNpantherspirit23 ]

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JamsessionVT
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STI stands for sexually transmitted infection. You can get them via sexual intercourse or sexual contact. You can still have one and be a virgin. It's entirely possible.

You do not list where you are from in your user info, but there are very few states in the U.S (if you are from the United States) where the legal age of consent is 14. Most are 16-18, but again, this depends on where you live. Either way, you are probably underage, in which case it is illegal. Just something you should probably know before you do anything further.

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Abbie
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CJHNpantherspirit23
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Member # 28121

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Oh, I know I'm prolly underage , and not only that but i was under the influence of alcohol.

Very Wrong , I know.

Posts: 21 | From: Arkansas | Registered: Mar 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
LilBlueSmurf
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You're not taking any responsibility in this whatsoever, and this is frustrating as someone who is trying to help you.

If you're underage for sexual activity, something tells me that you also underage to be consuming alcohol. Just as you chose to drink underage, you chose to have sex underage. Own up to it. It was a mistake, and hopefully, you'll learn from it.

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Nursing is a work of heart!
~ unknown

Posts: 7168 | From: Ontario | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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