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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » scared

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Author Topic: scared
Member # 25437

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I want to have sex with this boy. But Im scared its going to hurt because I havent gone any further than kissing and touching. Also Im scared the condom might break. If he knows how to use one, it wont break right? And also I dont want him telling everybody. Im jus scared of the unexpected and what might happen after. Like him not talkin to me for awhile. Is it normal for a boy to not talk to you after you have sex? And did I mention he is not a virgin, he probably did it to about 10 or more girls so he's experienced. And if your wondering how old me and him is. Im 14 and he is 15

[This message has been edited by FCUKINSTAR05 (edited 09-22-2005).]

Posts: 22 | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 1207

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Is this boy the same as this one? If so, i personally can't see why you'd want to have a sexually (or any kind of) relationship with someone with such a blatent disregard for your feelings.

As for your questions though ...

Sex doesn't hurt for everyone. Arousal and lubrication are key. Take time for some foreplay before going right for intercourse. Lube on condoms often aren't enough, so make sure you have a bottle of KY Jelly or Astroglide too.

Condom failure does happen ... Though it's not very often, condoms do break from time to time. This is a risk you're taking when you're engaging in sexual activity. Have you thought of using more than one method of birth control?

We have a few articles around here that i think you may find useful. Check them out.

Ready or Not? The Readiness Checklist
First Intercourse 101
Safe, Sound & Sexy : A Safer Sex How-To
Margaret Sanger’s Disneyland: An easy chart of your birth control options

Posts: 7168 | From: Ontario | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 17924

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If you are at all doubtful, don't do it. You've got plenty of time to think about it and plan things.

As much as it is your choice, I wouldn't do it just to do it. If you aren't in a relationship that is safe, loving and trusting, there are many more consequences that can come with sexual intercourse for the wrong reasons. You do not know if this boy has any STD/STI's, which can do a lot of damage since many don't show signs immediately. You don't know if he knows how to use a condom correctly, and even if you use it right condoms can fail for one reason or another (using one correctly means also using extra lubricant, and not pulling out before ejaculation), not to even get into the emotional side of intercourse, and how doing at the wrong time for the wrong reasons can do a lot of damage emotionally.

Really, we don't know this guy. Some guys who sleep around want nothing to do with the girl afterwards, and if this is the case, you've been used. Why would you want to put yourself in a situation like that, where if you do end up with an accidental pregnancy, you have no support from the father?

(Volunteer mindmeld!)

[This message has been edited by JamsessionVT (edited 09-22-2005).]

Posts: 3987 | From: Greater Burlington Area, Vermont | Registered: Apr 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 25437

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Thank You For your opinons and comments it really got me thinking about a few things
Posts: 22 | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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