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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Sex=love?

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Author Topic: Sex=love?
Member # 15538

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There's been a lot of talk in this forum about virginity, and I've noticed a particularly interesting thing. Some people tend to associate sex with love and others tend to associate sex with, let's say, lust.
How do you feel about this? Do you think love is a condition of sex and, if so, for what type of sexual contact (someone could possibly wish to have love when engaging in penis-in-vagina intercourse but not necessarily in oral sex, for instance). Or, on the contrary, do you believe sex is just about having a good time but not much more. In short, what sort of "connection", if any, do you look for when engaging in sex?

I just came up with this because I've noticed there are many different opinions on the topic. Some people consider sex can "indeed" enrichen your life while others have it just for having a good time and leave it at that. This sums up in one thing, basically, do you think sex can make you happy? Cheers

"Are you taking over? Or are you taking orders? Are you going backwards? Or are you going forwards?" T.C

Posts: 83 | Registered: Nov 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 961

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Either works, right? My ancient sex-ed book said (among other things) that there were three reasons people could have sex; for love, for fun, or to make a baby, and that so long as both people wanted the same thing it was okay. If they wanted different things that pairing was headed for trouble. It's a pretty simplistic way to put it, but I think there's something to it.

Quite simply, different people have sex for different reasons, but the important thing is that the people involved with each other should want the same things from it, not the reasons behind it. I'm cool with people having sex for whatever reason they want, so long as their desires are compatible.

Milke, with an L, Mrs BD to you, RATS, TMNTP, MF, CWCD, WAOTA

All you suicide kings and you drama queens . . .

Posts: 5122 | From: I *came* from the land of ice and snow | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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Member # 17924

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Love should never be something that only comes with sex (conditional upon)...there should be a very strong bond between the two people before they have sex, or any likeness. Sex to me is an expression of love between two people, therefore should never be taken lightly.
Hope I didn't offend anyone with my opinion...

"Accept Nothing; Challenge Everything"

Posts: 3987 | From: Greater Burlington Area, Vermont | Registered: Apr 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 10626

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Sex is different for each individual, and it means different things. as long as everybody involved knows the intentions of one's partner(s) then it doesn't matter what the motives were. Sex just means different things. It can be sinful and beautiful simutaneously because two people can have a difference in perception. i dunno if i'm making much sense.. i'm just saying.

however to me....

Sex is a powerful thing... and a beautiful thing, and as long as i choose my partners carefully, there is no reason why i couldn't go off frolicking with all of them. Sex FOR ME, is an expression of love...and at the moment that's all it has been for me. Granted, I am not against a one-nightstand. it's just's all i've had.. and i'm quite satisfied that it is....

If it makes you less sad, I will die by your hand...

Posts: 33 | From: A place where dreams end | Registered: Nov 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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