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» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Opinions?

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Author Topic: Opinions?
JnT69
Neophyte
Member # 13543

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Hey, my boyfriend and I have been going out for almost half a year ..and we are considering having sex. What is everyone's opinions on whether it's worth it or not?
Thanks
-Jess and Tom

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..and the Trogdor comes in the niiiiight..


Posts: 2 | From: NZ | Registered: Jun 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
DiamondGirl2K
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Hi,
Honey, I don't believe you should be worried about what other people's opinion are because we're not the one in the relationship, YOU are. Only you can decide whether it's worth it or not for many reasons. One reason being, sex doesn't just mean intercourse. There is oral sex, manual sex, anal sex and intercourse. Which act are you and your boyfriend considering?

Secondly, if it is intercourse you are considering...do you guys have condoms and lubes? Those are very important because condoms provide protection against STD's and pregnancy and lube helps things go a little smoother.

Are you on any type of birth control via the patch, ring or others? That also helps because using condoms and a second form on birth control means you will extra protected.

Are you and your boyfriend emotionally ready to have sex with each other? Do you guys have good communication skills when the topic of sex comes up? Communicating is very important because that helps clear up any concerns you may have and any misunderstandings. Do you and your boyfriend have a place for this? I ask this because having "sex" in a home where someone might walk in on you isn't very pleasant. Find a good place INDOORS where you have plenty of time and don't have to worry about getting caught. That might sooth your nerves and help keep you relaxed.

Is it worth it or not? You decide that depending on the state your relationship is in. Personally, I believe that if you care for each other a lot and BOTH WANT to do this and know that there won't be any regrets afterwards then it's worth it. But if you fight all the time, don't have any communication going on and might never talk to each other again after the fact then, no it wasn't worth it. I hope you make the right decision depending on what you want to do ok? Hope I've helped.

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DiamondGirl
Boogie Black
9~27~01
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Still Going Strong!
Forever and Always!


Posts: 137 | From: The Home of The Greatest: NY | Registered: Jul 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
logic_grrl
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 8067

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DiamondGirl2K's already made all the key points, but we also have some articles that you and your boyfriend should read while you consider:

Ready or Not? –The Readiness Checklist
First Intercourse 101

And if you do decide to have sex, make sure you've read these as well:

Safe, Sound & Sexy – A Safer Sex How-To
Margaret Sanger’s Disneyland - An easy chart of your birth control options


Posts: 6944 | From: UK | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
JnT69
Neophyte
Member # 13543

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Hello
Thank you to everyone who replyed.
To answer your questions..my boyfriend and I are extrememly good. We haven't gotten in one fight yet in almost 6 months..and I'm not exagerating. We agree on practically everything and respect every aspect of each other. As for the sex part, we are considering intercourse, as a sign of love for each other..and we are in love. We have amazing communication skills..we can talk to each other about almost anything and feel comfortable while doing it. We have condoms, and lube, and a safe spot. The only thing is, I am not on birth control. I also don't feel comfortable with my mom knowing that I am having sex..so I don't know how I can get birth control as well. I have an 18 year old friend, so is it possible for her to get them for me? And do I have to be on them for a certain amount of time for them to be affective?
Thanks


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..and the Trogdor comes in the niiiiight..

[This message has been edited by JnT69 (edited 06-19-2003).]


Posts: 2 | From: NZ | Registered: Jun 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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If by birth control, you mean the birth control pill, no, no one else can get them for you. You need to visit your gynecologist yourself (and doing so in advance of sexual activity is a part of readiness), ask about it, and if it's a good method for you, get a prescription.

The pill is only fully effective after being taken for one full cycle.


Posts: 67076 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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