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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Can't have orgasm/pain

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Author Topic: Can't have orgasm/pain
Member # 7994

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I feel really odd posting this, but I'm getting to a point where I need any help I can get, really. I'm 20 and I can't have an orgasm. I had one once when I was about 12 and I didn't really know what I was doing and it came as a huge surprise to me, but since then I have never been able to have one, on my own or with boyfriends. I'm in a commited 3 year relationship that is healthy and communicative. I don't know what the problem is. Every time I get near orgasm, the closer I get the more my clitoris hurts, or more recently it'll just start to hurt and after that I'm just not in the mood anymore, for anything, no matter how into it I was before. I never have an orgasm, it just gets to the point where I'm in a lot of pain and very sensitive. I thought it may just be hypersensitivity and that being more gentle would help. It doesn't. The pain is not a product of how gently or not gently pressure is applied, or friction, but of how good it feels, once it gets to a point where I feel I may be close to orgasm it hurts and it's all over. Please help. For years I've been feeling so awful over this. It's frustrating, but it also makes me feel broken and abnormal.
Posts: 4 | Registered: Apr 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Lady Moonlight
Member # 384

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It doesn't sound like you're broken or abnormal, but it does sound like you should mention this at your next GYN exam, if you haven't already.

If everything checks out okay physically (and you feel that your doctor really did a competent job), you may want to ask your doctor about other options to investigate. I know that Betty Dodson (author of Sex for One and sort of a guru of female orgasm) has written a great deal on the subject, and no doubt some of the other advocates and sexperts may have other suggestions.

Posts: 943 | From: Missouri, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 3820

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Vasocongestion? Not sure how you would go about treating that condition if what you're experienceing is an abnormal case of vasocongestion. Doesn't quite fit, but maybe... ask your doctor about it.

...I have a few other ideas and suggestions that aren't quite appropriate to post here. Contact me(see my profile)

[This message has been edited by somewhatanonymous (edited 05-06-2002).]

Posts: 141 | From: Seattle, WA, USA | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 3820

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or, if it wasnt' for that everyone seems to be afraid to put ANY contact info in there profiles, you could talk to debby_h since she seems to know all about this. But she doesn't have any contact info in her profile. but yah, for some reason her response is in the forum and not in this thread:
Posts: 141 | From: Seattle, WA, USA | Registered: May 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 961

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somewhatanonymous, we try to avoid making user contact information available as a matter of safety. Anything that relates to this site can be diswcussed on the boards, or in private e-mails t administration, and the chances of harassment from making contact information available for others is too high for us to consider acceptable.
Posts: 5122 | From: I *came* from the land of ice and snow | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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