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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Normal?

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Author Topic: Normal?
wrstlrb215
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Member # 7167

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Ok, well i was just wondering. Well me and my g/f just made love for the first time a few hours ago. And this is the first time i have slept with someone willingly. Everything was great but i never had an orgasm. Is that normal for a guy? I was thinking it might be becasue i was nervous, but i am not sure. Maybe it was just because we didn't go long enough, i could have gone longer,but i thought a guys first time was supposed to be really quick. Because we were at it for at least 25 minutes. thanks
Posts: 11 | From: Indianapolis | Registered: Feb 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Milke
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Good sex is defined by a lot more than orgasm. And how different people respond to first-time sex can really vary. So, whether you orgasm quickly, take your time, or don't at all, it's really not a big deal. And first time sex doesn't have to be overly quickly, it just has that reputation, as some guys do orgasm before they'd like to.
Posts: 5122 | From: I *came* from the land of ice and snow | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Sabrina Paige
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Before I go any further, so as not to sound confusing, I am a MTF pre-op transsexual. In a nutshell, I am a woman trapped in a man's body, but I am heterosexual (or a lesbian, depending on your outlook).

That being said, I wouldn't worry about it. I was in the same exact situation.

In my mid-teens, I could orgasm via masturbation without any problem. I lost my virginity when I was 15 and have had sex with several girls, but I could not orgasm during sex. I think 99% of it was the fact that I was nervous...nervous because sex was still a relatively new thing to me, nervous that I wouldn't perform well, etc...

Though it was frustrating as hell at the time, I wouldn't mind having that "problem" come back. One of the benefits to this is the fact that I was able to stay hard and have sex for a good long time (often well over an hour) before I got too physically tired. While other guys were cumming at the drop of a hat and leaving their girlfriends unsatisfied, I (unknowingly at the time) got a reputation of being pretty good in bed.

Enjoy it while it lasts, man. I'm 21 years old, and it's been gone for a few years now. I guess being young and nervous has it's benefits.

And, as far as satisfying your partner, there are two pieces of advice that I cannot stress enough: 1. Don't be afraid to learn (read books on sex & sexuality, learn what to do and what not to do) and 2. Communicate (find out what she likes; all women are different).

And I know this should go without saying, but BE SAFE. You'll be glad you did.


Posts: 6 | From: Hazleton, Pennsylvania, USA | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
insatiablesmiles
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hey
what Sabrina said makes a lot of sense. i've slept with a few guys and the one i rate as -best- is the one who can go for over an hour before he orgasms, which makes it a lot more possible for me to have an orgasm too. i don't all the time, and sex is -not- all about orgasm, especially for girls i think it's often more of a bonus than an expectation, whereas guys feel quite disappointed sometimes if they don't come.
i don't think you should worry - it's probably just nerves and once you relax more with your girlfriend hopefully you'll both be able to enjoy sex greatly.
and remember - you don't -have- to have an orgasm for it to be good.

-pandora
xxo

------------------
- you think you're the only one who's sexually frustrated?
- well come on baby , i'm ready!

[ american beauty ]


Posts: 100 | From: london, england | Registered: Dec 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
wrstlrb215
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Well i wasn't upset by it at all. And for me i thought it was perfect, it was just being with her that made it so special for me. I could really care less about an orgasm but i was just wondering if it was normal. Well thanks for the responses
Posts: 11 | From: Indianapolis | Registered: Feb 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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