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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » Gah, I'm so ashamed...

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Author Topic: Gah, I'm so ashamed...
Loneliestnumber
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I'm a 20 year old female, about to enter my secon year of college. I've recently found a great guy who fits me in every form and manner...but now I fear that I am pregnant.
I don't feel pregnant, honestly. I've not been queasy and most of the headaches I've had have been my seasonal sinus headaches. I feel like such an idiot now. We had been messing around, he and I, with mutual masturbation, one evening when he suprised me and attempted to push inside of me. The only reason it didn't work was because he suprised me and I believe I tensed up.
Anyhow, that occured twice, neither resulting in vaginal penetration.
About a week after both of these, I had my last period, which was the last Tuesday in May and extended into the first weekend of June.
Now my period has always been odd. Usually I'll start early one month, the middle the next and then late into the month after.
If it doesn't come by next week, I plan to take a pregnancy test and go from there.
I feel so utterly stupid and alone in this issue. My BF won't even consider it as a serious problem.
Also, within the last day or so, I've been having pains...not like cramps but just a sort of aching feeling to both sides of my abdomen.
I don't know exactly what I'm asking...I suppose I'm just looking for some support somewhere.

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~ maybe i'm the afterglow ~


Posts: 38 | From: Somerset, KY, USA | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
alaska
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Hey gal,

why not take a pregnancy test right now? From what you have written in regards to the time frame, a home prenancy test would give reliable results already and help you know for sure what is up. Why wait it out some more? When I recently faced a pregnancy scare despite condoms & the pill, I found that taking a test as soon as I found myself worrying really saved my sanity & energy.

Feeling "stupid" often happens when we are suddenly faced with a pregnancy scare, especially when we *know* that what we did was irresponsible and risky. But gal, it happened, and now you need to know what's up. So get yourself a test, immediately.

What worries me is that your partner doesn't care about this. Someone who doesn't care about whether you worry you are pregnant or not (pregnant by him) really isn't someone you want to be intimate with in the long run. He seems to lack some awareness here, sweeto.

However, your first priority should be to *know* what's up: so get yourself to the drugstore and buy two pregnancy test kits. One for now, and one for in a week, if your period is still a now show then.
And once oyu know what's up, make sure you get an STD screen, too.....and re-think whether this is a guy you want to be with.

If you would like some more feedback on this from other users (and what their experiences with pregnancy scares has been), I'd be glad to move this to a spot on the general boards. Just drop me a line okay?

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Caro
~spanking new Scarleteen Sexpert~

"Through repetition the magic will be forced to rise."

Alchemical Precept


Posts: 4526 | From: germany | Registered: Nov 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
alaska
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Moving to Sex Basics.
Posts: 4526 | From: germany | Registered: Nov 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gumdrop Girl
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in addition to what alaska said, as one college student to another, if you have these resources available to you (meaning you go to a *secular* or public college), go to University health Services. they offer health care that caters to students' needs and you can get on birth control really cheap there. at my school, a big fat supply of pills costs less than 20 dollars. and many university health services offer emergency contraception, in case you ever need that.

and from here on out, you should get oyur boyfriend to wear a condom while fooling around. if he doesn't, then don't let him near you -- he should respect your health.

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"And who are you who are so wise in the ways of science?" from Monty Python and the Holy Grail


Posts: 12677 | From: Los Angeles, CA ... somewhere off the 10 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Loneliestnumber
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I took Alaska's advice and got a pregnancy test this afternoon. I just finished taking it and the results were negative. I'm soooo relieved...
As for the health service, my college does offer them. I plan to go to them next month, when I move back into the dorms, and see about getting on either the pill or depo provera.
And definetly, from now on, it's condoms all the way. I've learned my lesson. Thank you guys SO much for your help!!

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"Never knock on Death's door. Ring the doorbell and run!"

C'mon, visit my website. You know you want to.
~Revelations.In.Black~


Posts: 38 | From: Somerset, KY, USA | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
alaska
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Good onya gal for going along and taking a test. And good that it was negative, too.

Now take another test in a week if your period is still a no-show then and get yourself scheduled for an STD screen at your Uni health services, too (when you go in for contraception), and you're all dead set and safe.

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Caro
~spanking new Scarleteen Sexpert~

"Through repetition the magic will be forced to rise."
Alchemical Precept


Posts: 4526 | From: germany | Registered: Nov 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Eppy
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Sweetie, I'm about to enter my second year of college too, and just had my own pregnancy scare doing similar stuff to you. We didn't even have sex!

I'm glad to hear you're not pregnant. For me, my anxiety only lasted a week, but I was two weeks late. It was the worst week of m life; I can't imagine how you must have felt for two whole months!

I had similar symptoms to you too. My right side hurt. I don't know whether this was cause my period was late, or what.

My advice to you: Your periods are screwed up, and you're having pains in your stomach. Something isn't right, even though you aren't pregnant. You should go to a gyno, and get checked out. I'm making an appt soon, to find out what was up with me, cause even though I wasn't pregnant, the fact remains that something was up with my body, and I don't know what. You can also get a PAP smear if you haven't already, cause you're over 18 AND sexually active. Good luck!


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Loneliestnumber
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Ironically, my mother brought up the fact that I've never had a gyno visit just recently. I'm long past due and I know I'll have to have one before I can go on any sort of contraceptive.
I'm hoping to wait till I move back to the dorms because, knowing my mother, she'll cart me off to her gyno. And I can just see me asking my mother's gyno about birth control :P
I -think- the pains in my side are from ovulation. I have heard it can be painful in some women and I -have- had these pains before.
I just hate having to wait for my monthly, though, and never knowing when I'll bleed. It always just "strikes me" and never seems to have a rhyme or reason.
You guys are so nice and helpful, makes me wish I had this kind of support back in highschool.

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"Never knock on Death's door. Ring the doorbell and run!"

C'mon, visit my website. You know you want to.
~Revelations.In.Black~


Posts: 38 | From: Somerset, KY, USA | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gumdrop Girl
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the pain from ovulation is called "mittelschertz" ("middle pain") and it's quite real for many women (except me, apparently).

as for preggie scares, if you're in college and you have access to the goods, just go get checked out. they deal with folks like us *all the time* so they won't shame you or bat an eye for that matter. don't rely on weird symptoms -- those don't usually appear for several weeks anyway, so what you feel immediately following the incident is probably psychosomatic.

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"And who are you who are so wise in the ways of science?" from Monty Python and the Holy Grail


Posts: 12677 | From: Los Angeles, CA ... somewhere off the 10 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Starry Night
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Lonelie -

Perhaps your mom's gyno can recommend a dr. in your area for you to see. I know that my mother's gyn told me he wouldn't even accept me as a patient - as do many of our area dr.s who have either a mother or daughter as a patient.

Just an idea - hope everything goes well.


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Loneliestnumber
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I did not know that, Starry. Thanks a ton, I'll check into it

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"Never knock on Death's door. Ring the doorbell and run!"

C'mon, visit my website. You know you want to.
~Revelations.In.Black~


Posts: 38 | From: Somerset, KY, USA | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
negative*nancy
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i'm not being overly cautious here... but it's a REALLY good idea to see your doctor and have a blood test, just to be sure.

HPT's are notorious for false negatives. I'm not trying to freak you out or anything... it's just important.


Posts: 361 | From: toronto, ontario, canada | Registered: Aug 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Loneliestnumber
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Well, I have plans to take another pregnancy test this Sunday or Monday if my monthly doesn't come this weekend. And if that HPT comes back negative, I'll either wait it out or go to the gyno.
You did freak me out somewhat but hey, it's easy to do that.

------------------
"Never knock on Death's door. Ring the doorbell and run!"

C'mon, visit my website. You know you want to.
~Revelations.In.Black~


Posts: 38 | From: Somerset, KY, USA | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Loneliestnumber
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I took my second pregnancy test yesterday and it came back negative too. Plus, last night, I had some fairly awful cramping and today I'm spotting.
Thank you guys for your help

------------------
"Never knock on Death's door. Ring the doorbell and run!"

C'mon, visit my website. You know you want to.
~Revelations.In.Black~


Posts: 38 | From: Somerset, KY, USA | Registered: Jul 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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