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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sex Basics and Sexual Health » pain

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Author Topic: pain
unhappykoger
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everytime i have intercourse it hurts. inside it hurts. sometimes bad sometimes just a little. im not sure why. ive asked my gyn but she doesnt know either. she said that it might be the position but it doesnt matter what position it still hurts. usually when he goes deep. its not that big of a problem it just irritates me sometimes. i get tired of going to the doctor so i thought that maybe i would ask for your opinions. any ideas as to why?
Posts: 365 | From: dayton,ohio,u.s.a. | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
LilBlueSmurf
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Not that i have very much exp. in the wonderful world of sex (intercourse is sex, but sex isn't always intercourse ... looks ms S, i'm learning!! teehee) but i've been told that sometimes if it hurts when you have intercourse, it could be your cervix getting in the way ... ??

I know it really really hurts. I had my first experience w/ the whole "ouch that's my cervix s***head!" hehe But he doesn't know if i don't tell him right? Communication is reallyyyyyyyyy important. Let him know that it hurts you and tell him to be more careful. If he doesn't, then no sex for him ... There's no reason why intercourse should hurt (unless it's relatively new to you, but i've read some of your other posts and i don't think it is) ...

As for the gyn, maybe you might want to get a second opinion. I'm not saying she's wrong or anything, but some doctors may find something that another didn't or hasn't. It's alright to ask for a referal to another GYN I'm sure she'll understand, especially if she knows how much this has been bothering you


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ErinK
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I have a few suggestions, but I don't know if they'll help...

1) It might be painful because you're not using enough lubricant.You could try making sure that you or your partner apply some lube (and put a little on the outside of the condom if your partner is wearing a condom) and see if that helps.

2) Sometimes penetrative intercourse is painful for me if my partner and I haven't engaged in enough foreplay. I want to have sex, but my body isn't ready yet. Stopping, taking some time for more foreplay, and getting more lubricant has usually helped that.

3) When I was depressed, I had trouble getting aroused. That lead to similar results as described in 2.

Hope this helps!

erin.


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unhappykoger
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ok we do not use condoms. or lube. we really dont need to. but its not that "carpet burn" feeling. its more like someone was pressing on me really really hard. its (im not sure what the area is called) below my stomach but above my pelvis and to the left. if that makes any sense. it does kinda feel like hes hitting something but im not sure. after he stops for a second the pain goes away. stupid me for starting again. i am going to switch gyns due to changing insurance so i will ask her about it too. but i dont know what to do until then. not "doing it" is out of the question. because its not bad enough to stop. but any more ideas? thank you for the others!
Posts: 365 | From: dayton,ohio,u.s.a. | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
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Koger,
I don't mean to be insistent, but ALL of the things you have had trouble with are ALL symptomatic of depression, something you have said you suffer from horrendously, yet have not sought treatment for. I cannot urge you to do that enough. It's getting to the point where I'm seeing you suffer wiuth these things, and it's almost painful to watch, because you know what the answer is, but you won't take care of it (or yourself).

(And as an aside, most people need lube. Even if you feel lubricated, it may not be enough, and it can make a big difference in your total comfort level, not just the feeling of your outer vaginal wall and opening.)

I;m not sure why not having intercourse is out of the question if it is painful for you right now. That makes no sense to me, and it makes me even more concerned. Sex should NOT been done in any instance where one partner or the other is experiencing pain, especially when you don't know what it's from. That just isn't okay.

[This message has been edited by Miz Scarlet (edited 07 November 2000).]


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unhappykoger
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i have been taking st. johns wort lately. i read somewhere on-line that it is the same as one of the ati-depressant drugs(i cant remember which one). it seems to help though. as for the pain, if it was bad enough to make me think that i should stop than i would. im sorry i will not bother you with my problems anymore i just wanted a few opinions thats all.
Posts: 365 | From: dayton,ohio,u.s.a. | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gumdrop Girl
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i will admit it, i have something against herbal remedies. maybe it's because I may go into pharmacy or biotech someday down the line.

unhappykoger, the drugs aren't the main thing that will help you out. What you need is the attention of another real-life human being. You need someone to talk to you face to face, someone you can tell about your depression. If he or she prescribes you medication to assist in treatment of your depression then take as directed.

we can give you advice as we see fit, but the best person to talk to really is your doctor or counselor. I am but a college student. Maybe in a few years I can give you professional advice, but for now, I can only speak from the experience of my 20 years on this earth.

------------------
Maurice! Bring in the albinos! muwahahahahaha!!!


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unhappykoger
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i understand that you are trying to help me and thank you. i dont mean to be such a b****. but besides the herbal remedy i am dealing with it on my own. i dont go to doctors. except the gyn, go figure. but my husband has been helping me lately, and him talking to me and spending more time with me is helping alot. i am not really concerned with the depression that much. i have been dealing with it so i guess i still can. its ok with that really. and i dont think that the pain is the cause of the depression anyway. but anyway dont worry about it. im ok. the pain has actually been less lately but is still not completely gone. its getting better.
Posts: 365 | From: dayton,ohio,u.s.a. | Registered: Oct 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
LilBlueSmurf
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*sigh* ...

Koger, if i go talk to someone will you? I'm 16 and in a relationship too and all that other fun stuff ... But i've also been depressed since i could walk/talk, soooo i think it's time to get myself fixed. I've alos just become sexually active and that's causing more problems than it's worth ... b/c i was molested last summer and it makes me think about it and stuff. Would you tell me to try talking to someone? How come it's ok for me to go and not you? Maybe we can be each other's therapists!! hehe I'll do it ... do'nt *make* me come up there chickie


Posts: 7168 | From: Ontario | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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