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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » I thought I was gay, but now I'm not so sure.

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Author Topic: I thought I was gay, but now I'm not so sure.
Member # 93877

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So, I've pretty much thought I was gay my entire life. Then I kissed another guy and it wasn't so great. I just passed it off as a bad first kiss. But then it happened with another guy. I'm definitely attracted to men physically, but I don't find kissing or touching them very enjoyable. On the other hand, I've always felt like I could marry a girl and be happy. With men, I can't really imagine anything beyond a physical relationship, whereas with women, I actually can. And I have been attracted to women, just less frequently than I am to men. But I've never kissed a girl. I guess I'm just really unsure about what I am.
Posts: 1 | From: Columbus, Ohio | Registered: Jan 2012  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Robin Lee
Volunteer Assistant Director
Member # 90293

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HI There,

Yes, I imagine it would feel strange to believe one thing for your whole life then have that belief rattled a bit.

Sexual orientation isn't one static thing. There are lots of permutations of of of heterosexual, gay, and everything in between. . Plus, there's fantasy, physical attraction, emotional attraction, etc, which one person could feel for other people of different genders. So it's not at all strange that you have sexual desires for men but can more easily imagine yourself in a committed relationship with a woman.

As to the kissing, it's possible that you're not a fan of kissing in general. Mind, that's just a possibility so please don't take it as fact. It could be lots of other things.

So, what are you? Well, you get to decide that.

I'm giving you a few articles we have that may give you some food for thought, and we're definitely here to chat about this more and help you figure things out.

Q is for Questioning

Living without Labels



Posts: 6066 | From: Washington DC suburbs | Registered: Dec 2011  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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