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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » How did you know?

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Author Topic: How did you know?
Member # 40863

Icon 7 posted      Profile for dslim03     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
This is open to any and everyone who wants to share there experiences. I did a post before sayimg how i thought i was a lesbian actually i know i am i just haven't accepted it yet.

But i wanted to ask "How did you come to the realization that you were a lesbian, gay, and/or bisexual?"

Anyone feel free to share...

Posts: 9 | From: Miami, Florida, usa | Registered: Oct 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 41176

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Oy, me too! I have "always" known that I'm gay, I just didn't accept it.
But it was slightly more complex for me.

Here in Algeria, we are taught that there's a heterosexual/asexual binary, so I was really, really, confused.
I never liked playing with the other boys, I preferred hanging out with girls instead, and I used to cross-dress from time to time.
That was all before primary school, though [Razz]

Then, when middle school started, all my friends were talking about their girlfriends, and how awesome making out is. I tried kissing a girl, but it didn't feel exceptionally good. They were also talking about porn, and straight porn never did anything for me.
After a few pseudo-experiences with guys, it was clear that I was sexually - as well as romantically - attracted to other males, so I looked it up, and found some sex ed sites which have finally made me understand that there IS such a thing as homosexuality, despite what our local clerics might say.


I know there is an over the rainbow for me.

Posts: 84 | From: Algeria | Registered: Nov 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 23917

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I'm not really sure, exactly. I've always been the type to do a lot of introspection, and so when I got into around middle school (maybe a little earlier) and actually learned what the term "bisexual" meant, it just sort of clicked. There's no real moment that I remember, or much of a process of self-discovery. I do remember at one point thinking about it and realizing that, in the long-term, I could picture myself getting old and having children and all that a lot more clearly with a woman than with a man. But for the most part, my orientation kind of just came to me as I started getting crushes, and it was never that big of a deal. *shrug* Maybe I was just exceptionally lucky.
Posts: 406 | From: California | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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It was pretty simple for me, even though at the time, the amount of awareness about bisexuality was basically zip compared to how it is now, so I didn't have any language to express what my orientation was for a handful of years.

I had sexual and romantic feelings for girls, and I had sexual and romantic feelings for boys.

Both sets of feelings were strong and pretty undeniable.

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Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Steel Angel
Member # 41232

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There was no grand epiphany for me either. Even when I was young, I felt a soft affinity for guys, even though I was taught by my parents that "queers were evil." All through my pre-college years, I just kind of welled my feelings about anything regarding sexuality for the most part, even though I knew I was "supposed" to be into girls, even though I really liked guys.

The kicker was in college, when I had my one sexual experience ever. I was with this woman, largely to experiment, and I flat out told her, right there in the bedroom, that it just couldn't work because both of us had the wrong body types, genitalia, and emotion sets. I know that might have been rather blunt and tactless, but it was how I felt.

It's something that's just been rather cut and dry for me all my life and I highly doubt it will ever change.

Posts: 13 | From: Somewhere | Registered: Nov 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 39023

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I also sort of always knew, just didn't want to accept it. Even when I was young, I knew I didn't really have any interest in boys, but didn't really understand my feelings for women. It was mostly once I hit puberty that I knew, but it's always a difficult thing to accept when you're young.

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Posts: 16 | From: USA | Registered: Jun 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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