Donate Now
Post New Topic  Post A Reply
my profile | directory login | register | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Got Questions? Get Answers. » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » How to get him to stop!

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: How to get him to stop!
cassieopiea
Neophyte
Member # 35770

Icon 1 posted      Profile for cassieopiea     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I have a friend (he's 13 years old) that keeps obsessing about his sexual orientation. Nearly every time I talk to him, he proudly boasts that he's either bi or straight. Inevitably, he'll doubt his earlier confidence and begin to stress over which he really is. This has happened more times than I can count, and every time I tell him that it's not healthy to be this preoccupied with his sexuality. He's thirteen and his hormones are having a wonderful few years at the county fair, so he's going to be confused about this for a while, and needs to stop incessantly mulling over it. However, no matter how many people give him the same (or similar) advice, he doesn't get it. What do you think I should tell him? Thanks

Pax

--------------------
Where did you leave your baby bleeding in her bed? Her ghost has come to stay.. Oh, you can try, you can't chase her away

Posts: 17 | From: California | Registered: Nov 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Gumdrop Girl
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 568

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Gumdrop Girl     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
Sometimes words will fall on deaf ears.

With that said, I'd emphasize that a person's identity is much more than his or her sexual orientation. People who obsess over the label they slap on themselves ought to be reminded of the other traits that make them the people we know and love.

--------------------
LA County STD Hotline 1.800.758.0880
Toll free STD and clinic information, and condoms sent to your door for Los Angeles County residents.
1 in 3 sexually active people will be exposed to a STD by the time they turn 24.

Posts: 12677 | From: Los Angeles, CA ... somewhere off the 10 | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Juniata
Activist
Member # 24611

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Juniata     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post   Reply With Quote 
I too have obsessed about my orientation during different times in my life--in part because of my anxiety, which has an OCD component. While it's likely that you're friend is just mulling things over, his obsessiveness could possibly be part of an anxiety disorder. (Though this is entirely from my own perspective as someone who's suffered from anxiety in the past, so I'm naturally more likely to suspect it in other people [Wink] )

But if he worries about other things as well, he might want to check in with a conselor, or take an online depression and anxiety screening test.

--------------------
I LOVE SCARLETEEN. This site is better than sliced bread!

Posts: 83 | From: Northeast | Registered: Jul 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

Quick Reply
Message:

HTML is not enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.
UBB Code™ Images not permitted.
Instant Graemlins
   


Post New Topic  Post A Reply Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3