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Author Topic: am i gay if i like transexual
taz127
Neophyte
Member # 32200

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Hello all.
i have a problem, i consider myself straight, but throughout the year i have been enjoying transgender porn, i have a girlfriend and find her very attractive at the same time. When i do watch tranny porn i do not consider them men, and i have to turn the sound off because they sound like men, and that puts me off.

is this normal, do other straight men find this erotic as well. am i bi because of this, and should i tell my girlfriend about this. please help me out as i am very confused.

thanks

Posts: 3 | From: uk | Registered: Jan 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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One of the biggest bummers about most transgender pornography is that it tends to marginalize people who are transgender even more, and enforce even more sterotypes about transgender. That's not only unfortunate for your understanding, it's unfortune because that population is already invisible enough per their realities.

Even if liking porn with a given gender in it was THE marker of orientation (which it isn't), female-to-male trannsexuals or transgender people do no identify as male or consider themselves to be male, so this has nothing to do with your being gay. Male-to-female transsexuals or transgender people usually identify as female, not as male. So, you're feeling attraction to those who generally ID as women.

And overall, it is heterosexual men who are the market for MTF porn.

Just a note, though? If you're having to turn the sound off because who they are, or what point of their process they're at is that repellent to you, that's you being unable to have their reality intrude upon your fantasy, and I'd suggest giving some thought to that, just in terms of how much you're objectifying the people you're watching, or contributing to their exploitation, and how that might contribute to the real-life realities (which are generally difficult at best) of those who are transgender in the world.

[ 01-12-2007, 02:37 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
littlemissiowa
Neophyte
Member # 36923

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I have to remind my boyfriend that these women do not have vaginas and he still has great attraction to them. He is obsessed. He masterbates to these videos frequently and I am humiliated that he is not interested in women or myself. I am obviously not what he is looking for. He had attempted anal sex with me multiple times and now I see why- my boyfriend is obsessed with "She-males" now with actual women. He likes anus and fake boobs and penises. NOT ME.

I hope he falls off of the face of the planet. To hell with the thought with him objectifying a section of humanity, he is obviously using me as he would a "She-Male" on his porn videos he is so fond of.

I can't help but feel rejected as a female. Think of how your girlfriend feels!!!!!!!!

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-Lauren-
Activist
Member # 25983

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Hey, littlemissiowa?

We'd very much appreciate it if you wouldn't project your situation onto the original poster, who doesn't necessarily need any shaming or negativity in asking a question. You may feel offended by what your boyfriend is doing; there's no guarantee his girlfriend will.

To hell with the thought with him objectifying a section of humanity, he is obviously using me as he would a "She-Male" on his porn videos he is so fond of.

"She-male" is a derogatory and offensive word to most who identify as MTF; could you please consider "transgender" or "trans" instead? In addition to that, I also don't think it's helpful to damn the notion of objectification of this group of people simply because you're upset; it's a real issue, and one relevant not only to the OP, but you, given you seem to be experiencing some of the same yourself, witnessing it in your relationship and experiencing it yourself.

If you'd like to start your own thread, we'd be happy to delve deeper into this, if you like.

Posts: 4636 | From: USA/Northern Europe | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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I am off to work at the clinic, but just a reminder for everyone that this is an inclusive community, and that this is a safe space for people of ALL gender identities, and a space populated WITH people of all gender identities. Please bear that in mind in your posts here: users who cannot keep this space safe for everyone will not be allowed to remain here.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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