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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » Friends' Views on Bisexuality

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Author Topic: Friends' Views on Bisexuality
emochickie7
Activist
Member # 24171

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I'm not sure if this post would fit into this forum, but it seems to be the best fit.

Whenever the topic of sexuality comes up among my friends, they pretty much unanimously agree that bisexuality shouldn't be a valid orientation. They think that people who say they are bisexual are really just still trying to figure out what orientation they are (heterosexual or homosexual), they're too shy/scared/whatever to call themselves gay/lesbian, or they're just really desperate. They have nothing wrong with people who consider themselves homosexual, but when it comes to people who call themselves bisexual they seem to be really close-minded. I do not think of myself as being bisexual, but I get upset when I hear these comments from my friends. I have friends who are bisexual, and even if I didn't, it upsets me to hear things like this. When they start to say things like that, I just keep my mouth shut. I want to tell them that they're very misinformed about the topic, but I'm worried that they will think I'm saying that because I'm bisexual (I'm not bi, but a lot of friends/people think that one of my best girl friends and I are in a secret relationship or something). Does anyone have any ideas of what to tell them? Or should I just continue to not join in the conversation when the topic comes up?


Posts: 43 | Registered: Jun 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
JamsessionVT
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 17924

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This isn't that uncommon. And unfortunately, there probably isn't a lot you'll be able to do to change your friends' minds.

If you have strong feelings about this, and your friends are really hurting/angering you by saying these things, you need to speak up. Keeping your mouth shut may keep the conversation to a low, but it isn't helping your end.

I think you need to say something, gently, but still something, to your friends. Something like "hey guys, I understand why you might think that, but making judgements like that really isn't OK with me" would be perfect. YOu don't have to get into a big to-do about it. If they are truely your friends, they will either drop it or at the very least respect your feelings. If not, than darlin', your friends aren't too good of friends.

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Posts: 3987 | From: Greater Burlington Area, Vermont | Registered: Apr 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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