Okay, I did a search, got nothing... so her goes.
School's coming back in for a lot of us. My problem is with changing for gym. See, I'm openly lesbian and am worried that people would freak out and harrass me, saying things like 'Hey! she looked at me while I was changing!' or 'You're in the wrong changing room!' or something. I'm going into 8th grade in Dallas, Texas, in case there're any regional differences (judging by the dress code forbidding crossdressing, there are.)
Has anyone else had this problem? (okay, someone probably has.) If so, how have you dealt with it? No, I don't want to dress in feminine clothes, that would require changing the contents of my closet and I don't feel comfortable wearing girls'/women's clothes.
------------------ I love children - parboiled. -- W. C. Fields
your situation is a tougie sweetie. i have the upmost respect for you for being so open about your sexuality, but unfortunately, lots of people don't feel the same way.
and you know what? thats just people. no matter what you are, lesbian, skinny, fat, pale, black, yellow, purple, whatever, people will ALWAYS find something to make fun of you for. i'm not saying it's okay, or that's how things should be, but it's just the reality of it.
my advice to you: rise above it. if people start making fun of you, they're not worth you acknowledging their existence. i know it's hard to keep a stiff upper lip, but i know you can do it. you just have to believe in and love yourself. and don't worry...everyone isn't like that. you'll find friends, and you'll make enemies. that's what makes life so flavored.
and, no, i wouldn't imagine you'd have to change your wardrobe. i've worn boy clothes for several years (until i was more comfortable with my body) and not many people had a problem with it.
------------------ Hail Eris! KaAAIXTI! All hail Discordia! 23 Skidoo!
"If you're going to be a non-conformist, you're going to have to wear the uniform."
I get the whole 'you're in the wrong changing room/toilet' a lot. I'm straight, but I'm a tomboy and for some people in my school tomboy=transsexual. One day I was feeling extremely rebellious so I said 'oh, so I am, thanks for reminding me' and walked into the boys toilets. Not a smart move. I was just digging myself a deeper hole doing that.
I know it's gonna be tough, but try to laugh it off, it'll make them see that it doesn't affect you (it also helps to fight down the urge to bang the person's head against a wall) *Badger*
Good for you that you have the courage to openly admit that you are lesbian especially since the school you're in does not seem to be homosexual friendly. The best thing that i think you can do is ignore them, but if you are really uncomfortable changing in front of them, can you change in a place where they won't watch you? like a bathroom stall or something? I know that it is not good but, if all else fails you could probably do that
Posts: 5 | From: Canada | Registered: Jul 2002
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I came out to my friends and somehow everyone in school ended up knowing I liked girls. Well I was getting dressed for gym and for some reason all the girls when into the bathroom to change. I asked one of the girls what was going on and she said, "No one wants you queer eyes on them!" I failed gym that year because I didn't get changed after that day. I don't know what I'm going to do this coming school year. Help.
Posts: 2 | From: Levittown, Pa, USA | Registered: Aug 2002
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This year I would change for gym. It's their problem they're homophobic, not yours. Really, it shouldn't be a problem for anyone (unless you actually are sexually harassing them, but that doesn't sound like the case).
And something to consider is maybe it was only the one girl who had a problem with you. Several girls in my P.E. class changed privately and it had nothing to do with my sexuality - I never told them and they weren't the type to believe idle rumors. The one girl I was out to changed publicly, go figure.
I have had different experiences with this. A lot of people at my school know that I'm gay... and then a lot of people assume that I am. At one point, a lot of people thought that a girl in my row of lockers was gay, and whenever she came in to change, it was like the parting of the red sea. Soon that rumor was dispelled and everything went back to normal. But I am very comfortable with my body, and don't really care WHO sees my body. People can feel that sense of confidence, and won't bother you. And if they do, just assure them "No, really. We are in a LOCKER room. I am changing, and I am not looking at you changing, and I am not at ALL turned on by you." lol.
Posts: 21 | From: LA, CA, USA | Registered: Feb 2002
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I know exactly how you feel about changing for gym. I'm in the same situation. When I came out in eigth grade, everybody sort of stared at me when I went into the gym. I nearly failed the class because I had refused to go into the dressing room because of all the girls were leering at me every time I entered a room. Now I'm in 10th and I'll have gym next semester. I'm not sure what I'm going to do about it. People at my school seemed to have matured a lot since middle school. good luck to you.
------------------ "It's better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you're not."--Unknown
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