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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » Some one help

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Author Topic: Some one help
Member # 8400

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Hi I am Alex and I am a 16 year old male.
I am not openly gay but I am bicurious.

I have this (male) friend (WE WILL CALL HIM BOB FOR LACK OF CONFUSION) who I always sort of flirt with, but it always seems to be kind of jokingly. Well the other day I was at a different friend's (female)house, when Bob came over. We were watching a movie , Suburbia(actually a pretty good movie) when I went upstairs to go et something out of the girls room. Then I was about to leave the room when I realized he was upstairs too. I went over to him and something goofy and a little suggestive. Then we started to wrestle on her bed until we ran out of brethe then all of the sudden he just put his hand in my pants. I was kind of suprised at this but then i just let him go for it. But then before anything major could happen the girl walked in and saw us like that. Neither of us are openly gay. And i think she will tell everyone we are, when i am not even sure what i am. I dont know what to do somebody please help.

Posts: 1 | From: Bensalem | Registered: May 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Miss Thang
Member # 5508

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First, I would say that you need to talk to this guy, and discuss exactly what happened, and where you want to go from here with him, if anywhere. Next, you should probably speak to this girl, (if you feel comfortable doing so) and tell her that you weren't sure what you were doing at the time; explain your confusion, and APOLOGIZE for doin' anything in her bed without her knowledge. Sorry if I come across a little harsh, but when you find people fooling around in your bed, it's not a good feeling. Especially when they didn't ask you and you had no idea. Not cool. And ask that she not speak of this incident with others; which would only add to the confusion of this situation.

Lastly, you need to sort some things out in your own head. Are you comfortable with what you did with this guy? If so, great, but I am a little skeptical of him just sticking his hand down your pants all of the sudden. If anybody did that to me, I'd slap 'em. No matter how cute or awesome they are. If you're just wrestling, and you've given no indication that you're interested, or given any sort of consent, what he did wasn't cool. (My opinion)

Posts: 211 | From: Chicago, IL | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Confused boy
Member # 1964

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He could have just been trying to read the signs, those flirtations, just like Alex and he went for it. It doesnt strike me as a massviely wrong thing to do though I would never make that my first obviously erotic move towards any gender.
Posts: 711 | From: England | Registered: Nov 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 8446

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I can understand why you would be upset, it's scary to think that she might tell people. It's a scary thing to have something you aren't even sure about yourself to be spread to others! I think you need to talk to both of them, and if she does tell people... then I guess a good thing to do is stay brave. Be strong, and remember that things ALWAYS get better!
Posts: 5 | Registered: Jun 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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