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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » Sexual Identity » I thought I was a lesbian..?

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Author Topic: I thought I was a lesbian..?
snarlkitty
Neophyte
Member # 6691

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Okay, so I thought I was a lesbian.. and now I find myself attracted to mass numbers of FTMs. I have always known I was deeply attracted to a butch - I started saying that I could appreciate a femme, but only wanted a butch for a relationship. It seems like that level has been upped to transgenders.

Does this make me less of a lesbian?

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hush up, little dirty girl.


Posts: 9 | From: Portland, Oregon, USA | Registered: Jan 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
sapphirecat
Activist
Member # 5317

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Probably not, just as girls liking MtF's doesn't make them less hetero. But that's just my guess

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Sapphire Cat
You can love me or hate me, but it won't change who I am.


Posts: 235 | From: Louisville KY (St. Matthews) | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
PoetgirlNY
Activist
Member # 168

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Well, technically, it does make sense that it would make you less textbook lesbian, but who cares for rules anyway? You can identify however you choose. I have lots of trans friends, and I've seen their partners deal with this in different ways. One approach is to consider their partner an "exception" if otherwise they are only attracted to women. Of course, if you are mainly attracted to FTMs, it might be harder to consider them an exception. You might decide to consider them an exception as a group. Or you might change the way you identify to fit your attractions. I have a friend who identified as a lesbian for years, and then when her partner transitioned, starting identifying as bisexual so as not to exclude the person she was in love with from her sexual orientation. Another way to deal with all this, and my personal favorite, is to do away with the labeling in general. You can just be attracted to whoever you're attracted to, be a part of whatever community(ies) you feel comfortable in, and have that be that. Of course, it's all up to you, because there is no "Lesbian Rulebook"

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"I'll be a Venus on a chocolate clamshell rising on a sea of marshmallow foam."
-Hedwig


Posts: 1101 | From: San Francisco | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Dude_who_writes
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 5640

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Truthfully, you're sexuality is what you define it as. There is no set mold that you have to fall into. People change, and over time, their sexuality can change too. It's completly natural evolution.

[edited for clarity]
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Tim
ST Advocate

"Read the Bible again sometime. Women are painted as bigger antagonists than the Egyptians and Romans combined. It stinks." --"Serendipity," Dogma

[This message has been edited by Dude_who_writes (edited 01-24-2002).]


Posts: 712 | From: Michigan, US | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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