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ninaBruja
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errm.. i have a feeling i'm gonna sound INCREDIBLY dumb asking this, but how exactly does a teenage bisexual girl get a girlfriend?

i mean..... i'm at least somewhat attractive.. ok-looking, brainy, funny, nice smile, all that. so normally i shouldn't have any problem getting a gf, right? except.. my school can be pretty damn homophobic at times (ugh it sucks), & the only way to know if someone's gay is if they actually TELL you. so that makes the situation even more difficult.

so what do i do? should i come out & see what happens? try & look for a GLBT center/gay-straight alliance? start wearing a rainbow bracelet? make gay friends?

auuuugh HELP!! i really want a girlfriend or i'll go insane w/o anyone to relate to!!

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i was thinking that i might fly today
just to disprove all the things that you say


Posts: 27 | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Hotbuttered101
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Hey Nina

I'm getting the vibe that you're out. That would obviously help Overall I think you answered your own question. Get involved in the 'gay scene'...And, if you are out, be open about it.


Posts: 86 | From: South Africa | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
-Jill
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quote:
Originally posted by ninaBruja:
should i come out & see what happens? try & look for a GLBT center/gay-straight alliance? start wearing a rainbow bracelet? make gay friends?

All of these sound like good ideas to me. As far as coming out goes, don't do anything you're uncomfortable with - coming out can be tricky. However, if you are out it might make others (regardless of whether they're out or not) more willing to open up to you.

As far as having no one to relate to Scarleteen can help you there. We have many glbt people around.

Check out http://www.scarleteen.com/gaydar/out.html a wonderful article on how to come out without causing yourself major trauma.


Posts: 3641 | From: Truckee, CA, US | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Hotbuttered101
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"Doh!" *Feels like a totall shmuck* I didn't see the 'should I come out' part.
Posts: 86 | From: South Africa | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Hotbuttered101
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*total*
Posts: 86 | From: South Africa | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
BJadeT
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quote:
the only way to know if someone's gay is if they actually TELL you.

Or....(scary music).....if you ASK them! Yep, really. It might be a bit awkward sometimes, but it could also lead to you finding the love of your life.
Or maybe we could just develop a secret handshake or something...

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You wanna save humanity, it's just the people you can't stand-John Lennon

Witness the infinite justice of the new century. Civilians starving to death whilst waiting to be killed.

Manky Confuddledness-My new, improved Blog.


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PoetgirlNY
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If you're not worried about harrasment or violence in your area, you might want to get a rainbow bracelet or something, so that if you meet the girl of your dreams, she won't walk away assuming you're straight. Finding a relationship in school is harder than looking outside of school. A queer youth group is definitely a good idea. And you also might need some patience, because it can be really hard to find someone you're compatible with. Sometimes you might feel like if someone else is a queer girl, then BAM you have a relationship, but keep in mind that you can keep whatever standards you usually have. Make sure that you do actually like the girl.

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"I'll be a Venus on a chocolate clamshell rising on a sea of marshmallow foam."
-Hedwig


Posts: 1101 | From: San Francisco | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Hotbuttered101
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by BJadeT:
"Or maybe we could just develop a secret handshake or something... "

Ooh...Yes...There is something like that. It's not a handshake though. You're suppose to go to the person who you think/hope is gay and go "Nice shoes " Then the person is suppose to reply the same thing but without looking at your shoes. The problem arises when you are unsure if the person in question is actually speaking about shoes. Another problem is the fact that not too many gay people know about 'nice shoes' so spread the word

This fantastic idea originates from the technodyke message forums if anyone was wondering.


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sapphirecat
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If GLBT groups are lacking in your area, drop by your local college and look for a group (or the symbols thereof: JCC had several people with a pink triangle labeled "Safe Place" on the door)... they might accept people from the general community, even if their main focus is college students.

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Sapphire Cat
You can love me or hate me, but it won't change who I am.


Posts: 235 | From: Louisville KY (St. Matthews) | Registered: Sep 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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