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Author Topic: bigots (venting, probably long)
rambler
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Okay... I have been wrestling with this basically all day and it is still bothering me so I am just going to rant here for a second I guess.

Some background: I'm currently living with my SO and going to Community College because my school is all...well, odd (you can hear a bit about it where I ranted a bit in Village People...) and I needed some basic classes in things.

Anyway, this town is officially in the Bible Belt. My SO isn't from this area (his stepfather transferred here to the Navy base) but he's been staying here for 2 years because he has a scholarship which covers school here. Anyway, it is also a Navy town, so it's rather diverse for the area. I've really never run into any bigotry that has sent me into a tailspin like this and I've been here since January.

Anyway, I have a group project in my sociology class. Normally, I'd be annoyed with this, except that 4 of us are A students and we'll be fine. So we got together this morning to talk about this project. But we didn't have that much to talk about. So I don't know what exactly happened, but at some point one of my group members said "Well I would never go down to Disney, I am not that kind of person, I don't support them."

I did the usual double-take I do when I hear of people banning Winnie the Pooh and Mickey Mouse from their home. And then I asked the stupidest question ever.

"Why are you boycotting Disney?"

Why do I do this to myself? Of course I very well know what the answer is going to be. But I ASKED.

"Because I cannot condone their gay agenda. They have a very gay agenda."

Please excuse me while I bang my head against a wall. Oh, but it gets better.

So I said, "You know? People need health insurance. It is a fact of life. It's really not going to hurt you for them to have health insurance." I then told her of a few experiences I have had with hospitals when they don't like my insurance card and they know they can basically be rude and mean to me because I'm not covered.... So she started to rant about how if that is all the case then my boyfriend and I should have domestic partner insurance.

First of all--I am only visiting. Second of all, I work a minimum wage job. She is aware of both of these things. So I was just about to let it drop there. I mean, I was just getting tired of it all. Then she said that she would like for all of us to just go back into the closet. I shrugged.
Then it got really fun. Because another girl started to say, "Well, you know, I almost think that it's better that they're out, because if I were a single girl I would want to know." I said, "You know? If a person's gay, it's not like they're going to come after you." She said, "But then you have all those damn BISEXUALS who are all confused!"

Really? That's news to me. Apparently, as a bisexual, I get all my jollies out of preying upon straight people who aren't interested in being contaminated. Yeah.

And you know? I just shut up right there. I just decided to let the battle go. And I'm still mad at them, but I'm mad at myself too. I don't know... Most of the time I am content with not saying much but I really am conflicted right now. Both of the women who were discussing this have been my friends up until this point. And neither one of them know how much they have bothered me and how much being around them is going to be difficult from now on. I mean, it's not like I am really close friends with anyone here because it's not like I am staying. But it would have just been a lot easier to not know all this about these people. I now feel as if I was really stupid for not just out and just telling them I am queer. I know I don't have any obligation to do that, but I wonder why I didn't. I REALLY wanted to. But I guess it's just that this IS the bible belt and I don't particularly want to have rumors spreading. And who knows if they'd suddenly decide I was somehow lying to my boyfriend and make a big stink to him about it...

ARGH.

I am so tempted to corner the pair of them and just tell them that they've really disappointed me and that they should not assume everyone is straight, etc... but do I really want to open myself up to MORE of this stuff?

*sigh* Any thoughts appreciated. Thanks.

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rambler
Visit disabledsex.org -- Disability and Sexuality.
Or, find out how to join the teen discussion list
The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well.
--Joe Ancis


Posts: 141 | Registered: Mar 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Juice
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hmm, maybe im really out of it, but i don't understand the conection between disney, and health insurance. why does disney have a gay agenda? im confused...

[This message has been edited by Juice (edited 06-30-2001).]


Posts: 45 | From: Toronto, Ontatio, Canada | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Dzuunmod
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Hey Juice,
Disney has been targeted by various anti-gay groups for a variety of 'offences' such as having gay theme days at its theme parks, and extending substantial benefits to the partners of its gay employees.

Disney, in the eyes of those groups, was also at least partly responsible for the plethora of gay characters now present on prime time television. The Disney-owned ABC network brought us 'Ellen', don't you know...

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Posts: 1515 | From: Montreal, Quebec, Canada | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Shadowhawk
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Not only does Disney's "gay agenda" consist of what Dzuunmod has already explicitly mentioned, but (gasp!) they also allow for gay marriages on the premises.

As I told a rather twerpy friend who used that as his excuse for not going to Disneyland with us [a bunch of friends], "it's still money whether you're gay or straight! What's Disney care when they're still getting their exorbitant amounts of money?"
But that doesn't matter, because the park and the company has already been "tainted" with gayness. Oy.

I agree with you rambler, it's stupid, as is the whole "bisexuals are confused and slutty" frame of mind.

[This message has been edited by Shadowhawk (edited 06-30-2001).]


Posts: 80 | From: Phoenix, AZ, USA | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Pixie69
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I think I'll vent too I was at the IHOP with my parents, and there was a cashier there who used to ride my bus and knew my friend/exboyfriend. So she asked me how that friend was, I said he had a nice boyfriend now, she asked when we broke up, I said about a week after we got together (all this is in front of my parents, ugh).

As we walked out my mom was like "bi!? you went out with a bi guy??" and she just went on and on about how could I do that, I was just opening up the possibilities of them cheating on me and blah blah. Then my parents started talking about how there were more younger bi people than older bi people so maybe it was just a phase and blah blah. And then my mom starts saying bi people are just confused (because y'know, you're never too young to be hetero, but always to young to be not) or just want to keep their options open or whatever.

Want to know the best part? They know I'm bi. They didn't know that I knew that they knew, but they did know that I was bi as they're saying all this in front of me. And people wonder why I don't like my parents.

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Brittany
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"Just say no" fights teen pregnancy the way "hey, cheer up" fights manic depression.


Posts: 1339 | From: Las Vegas, NV, USA | Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
rambler
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On a similar note...

My mother is continually saying these really homophobic things in my presence (particularly if we are around people whom she thinks will be "on her side" or whatever) and then saying in a really loud, obnoxious tone, "Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot! We can't say those things around you," and then explains in annoyance how her daughter is obsessed with human/gay/whatever rights.

Grr...

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rambler
Visit disabledsex.org -- Disability and Sexuality.
Or, find out how to join the teen discussion list
The only normal people are the ones you don't know very well.
--Joe Ancis

[This message has been edited by rambler (edited 07-01-2001).]


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