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Author Topic: I wanna go to that damn school!
Ste-Funnie
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I'm tired of running! I am getting out of breath! I can't put anymore effort into this crap!

There's a gay guy that used to work at a hair solon. He moved to a gay high school when he was a teen. I wanna convince my mom to let me go to that school, but I can't convince her to do anything. Unlike when I wanted a dog and she wasn't ready, she said she can consider it. But this on would take a long time to consider it, on the grounds that I'm a junior now and I'm going to be a senior next year. Then I will gad and I am obviously not going to college b/c I have a 2 yr course of BOCES (pre-college). I will still be able to go to college, and there are gay colleges, but I don't wanna wait.

I wanna throw a tantrum to my mom about it, but that don't get you nowheres. I don't wanna go to gay places! They're a huge dump! I just wanna go to either a gay school, or a gay community. I don't care which.

My mom doesn't even know I want this so bad. She thinks I'm think "eh not important". No! She even said to me I don't need it! I do need it! Not only so I can date, but so I can feel wanted and I don't feel wanted at all!

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

Posts: 251 | From: Long Island | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Pumpkin_Pie
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Hey Stef-funnie, why do you think gay places are dumps. Why do you think a gay high school wouldn't be a dump? Isn't it possible that whatever you don't like about LGBTQ services could be present at this school?

Have you tried writing down your feelings about it in a letter to your mam, if you find talking doesn't work?

Do you think you might be able to convince your mother to at least visit the school to get a feel for it?

Rebecca

[ 02-03-2011, 05:50 PM: Message edited by: RebeccaM ]

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Ste-Funnie
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That's a good idea to ask her to visit the school.

And the thing is, those places aren't as worth it as the HS. For one thing those gay sevices are only once a week/month. The school is every day except the weekends. One reason why I'd say it's a dump is b/c they do nasty things there, such as humping, giving TMI, inappropriate touching, etc. Obviously, they wouldn't do that in a school. If you did that in school, you'd get stuff like detension, etc. So that's why it's obviously a dump. I consider it a dump! In literal dumps they have nasty garbage; well, the building is a dumpster and the inappropriate behavior is the garbage.

Plus, the gay schools are for people who truly are GLBT unlike the places, where A; they're just trying to be popular, B; using people, C; leaving their date for the opposite sex. That is garbage.

Obviously in GLBT schools as opposed to the groups, they won't leave me for a man.

Know what I mean?

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

Posts: 251 | From: Long Island | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
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Ste-Funnie: I need to remind you again that it's important this space remain a safe space for all users.

There are other things that should probably be talked about with some of what you said (like the fact that no one has any way of knowing who is "real" per orientation anywhere), but as director here, I need to address only one of them.

quote:
the gay schools are for people who truly are GLBT unlike the places, where A; they're just trying to be popular, B; using people, C; leaving their date for the opposite sex. That is garbage.

Obviously in GLBT schools as opposed to the groups, they won't leave me for a man.

Calling people garbage here is not okay and it's not okay for anyone here to do it.

As well, people leave people for all kinds of reasons, no matter their orientation. "Real" LGBT people have and DO sometimes leave partners of a given gender for one of another gender sometimes (or change their own gender identity, or have a partner do so), including those who are gay or lesbian.

It happens for a bunch of reasons, but it happens. And someone deciding they have feelings for one gender rather than another or deciding to leave a partner for that reason does not make that person garbage. It makes them a person who found they had feelings for someone of a different gender than a previous or current partner.

As well, not everyone has the same journey in discovering their orientation, and some people's ways to finding that out may not look like yours or like you want them to. They also may not always be what you assume they are.

If you are going to be here, as we have talked about before, you need to find a way to express your feelings with less judgment and in ways that do not attack other people like this. We ask that of all our users.

Please consider this the last time I'm going to say things like this to you. We've already invested a lot of time explaining things like this, and at a certain point when we have to remind any user of the guidelines a lot, we need to draw a line and set a limit so we can do our best for the community as a whole.

This is not the right environment for everyone, and it may be it's not one for you, but since you seem to like coming here, I'm willing to give you one more shot at posting here in a way that works within our guidelines and our community if you want it.

[ 02-03-2011, 07:47 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Ste-Funnie
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I never said the people were garbage. I said what they are doing was garbage. Do you think I wanna date someone who leaves me for a guy bc they were jus using me? I don't think so.

I wasn't even talking about them leaving me all together. I just don't want them to leave me on the grounds that they were NEVER interested. I just don't want a user and don't you think using people is garbage? I want someone who wants me for me.

Plus, RebeccaM asked me why I think it's a dump and I answered the question. If I don't want people to say what I don't wanna hear I don't even ask questions. That's just me. Thats all. If you find this judgmental, my apologies.

I honestly still do think that the lgbt HS is more worth it for me. I'd still rather go to the HS than services. I think I might be more comfortable there.

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

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CoatRack
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Saying that what they are doing is garbage is not OK, either. A lot of Scarleteen users, including myself, have either worked at or attended LGBTQ Youth Groups and found a lot of use in them. They have been important parts of many youth's and young adult's experiences and devaluing that is not OK.

I do think that using people is bad - but I don't think that what you are describing is "using" somebody. A girl who breaks up with a girl and dates a boy is no different than a girl who breaks up with a girl and dates another girl. A lot of people date more than one person and in a monogamous relationship (that means only dating one person at a time) it doesn't really matter who they might date after.

If you think that the LGBTQ HS will work better for you then the mature thing to do is to research their admissions policies, and present it to your mother. Like you said, a tantrum will not work. But remember, it's not a sure thing. Your mom may have a lot of reasons to not want you to go. Having a conversation about why she doesn't want you to go is probably step 1.

[ 02-03-2011, 09:23 PM: Message edited by: CoatRack ]

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Hey folks, my name is Andrew and I was a mod here for awhile a couple years ago. I'll be here for a couple weeks while Heather is out and the site is even more short-staffed than usual

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Ste-Funnie
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I thought I ignored you! I thought that I can't see your say to me! What happened!

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

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Ste-Funnie
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Plus, in order to have an open relationship, aren't you originally upposed to both agree to do it?

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

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Heather
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Ste-funnie: there is not an ignore option on our boards, there never has been. Additionally, CoatRack is one of our volunteer staff. Any user always has the option to choose not to read what any user of staff person says here, however, because staff are who keep this place running, and also who moderate the space, it's important users do pay attention to posts from staff.

I'm not sure what you're asking about open relationships, but if you are asking if people need to agree it's okay to date more than one person at a time, or to be in an open relationship, yes, that is ideally the way people go about that, with honesty and agreement.

Andy was also addressing the fact that people who move from one relationship to another, something that happens all the time, will not always choose one particular gender to date or be with next. As well, I think what Andy was also pointing out was that because someone chooses to leave a given relationship, for whatever reason, no matter who they do or don't date after, that does not mean, by itself, the person they were previously dating was being used.

[ 02-04-2011, 01:48 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Ste-Funnie
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quote: Ste-funnie: there is not an ignore option on our boards, there never has been. Additionally, CoatRack is one of our volunteer staff. Any user always has the option to choose not to read what any user of staff person says here, however, because staff are who keep this place running, and also who moderate the space, it's important users do pay attention to posts from staff.

Then can you explain the link that said "Add to Ignore List"?

quote: "Andy was also addressing the fact that people who move from one relationship to another, something that happens all the time, will not always choose one particular gender to date or be with next. As well, I think what Andy was also pointing out was that because someone chooses to leave a given relationship, for whatever reason, no matter who they do or don't date after, that does not mean, by itself, the person they were previously dating was being used."

No Heather. I never said that. You're wrong. I never said at all that dating someone else after a break up is wrong. It would be like saying getting a new computer after your other one broke is wrong, or getting a new cat after your other one ran away/died is wrong. No.

Of course someone is going to break up with me, and even date someone else whether its male/female. More importantly, I don't want someone who uses me for stupid things, whether they're a cheater or none. My first bf when I was straight said that I'm allowed to cheat on him, which was a bad sign, therefore I don't wanna cheat on anyone.

BTW, I just want you to know Heather, I had no idea that what I said up there was a judgment. I usually check with my mom of what I say but I couldn't now b/c I don't want her to see what I'm talking about. I ain't ready to tell her about this. I wanna bring it up on my own. But I'm very sorry about this.

I also what you to know that part of my autism is that when I say things, I don't realize if I sound rude or not. My close adult people alway remind me, "Ste-Funnie, I think there's a better way to say that." For example, if the music is too loud, and I say "turn down the volume", my aunt would give me a reminder, and I correct myself and say, "can you please turn down the volume".

The thing is, I was answering what Rebecca asked me and I was telling her why I would be more comfortable in gay HS than services.

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

Posts: 251 | From: Long Island | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
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As the FAQ explains, that link is about ignoring people in private messages. But we don't have private messaging enabled for users on the site, so it's not a tool that does anything on the boards.

I understand that your disability can make it a more challenging for you to speak in certain ways.

That said, everybody has differences and everyone has to try their best to say what they want to clearly. But the internet is different than talking to people in person. This is writing, not speaking.

When you are talking in person you can kind of use a "rewind button" and say "Oops, what I meant to say was..." but online, because the communication happens at a different speed, that you may just need to re-read all of what you write BEFORE you hits post, because the "rewind button" doesn't work as well online.

In terms of checking in with your mother about judgments, obviously it's up to you what you ask her about.

I understand you're sorry, and appreciate the apology. However, I think what you need to do is figure out if you have the ability to follow our guidelines and the user agreement around tone without someone helping you in-person like we've talked with you about many times. If you don't feel you can, you're going to need to recognize this just may not be the right space for you as we need users here to be able to understand and follow those guidelines, otherwise, one user can make the space feel very unpleasant or unsafe for the whole community, which just isn't workable when it comes to managing our community.

So, over time, if someone clearly can't work with those guidelines and doesn't opt out themselves, we will need to make that choice for them.

Speaking of not understanding, perhaps we are not understanding what you mean when you talk about people using other people or people leaving others they're in a relationship with for a new relationship with someone else. You're more than welcome to try and explain it differently if you want us to understand.

[ 02-04-2011, 04:47 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Ste-Funnie
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Heather, you do know that I don't choose not to follow the guidelines. Sometimes I don't know what is a judgement or what isn't. I never mean to be judgmental. It's obviously unintentional. I don't like judging others, on the grounds that I intentionally treat people the way I want to be treated. I say that all the time.

The part where y'all said "this just may not be the right space for you", well, the truth is, I don't know any other sights that answer your questions/problems, and where I can feel accepted and where I am anonymous and I can give personal info. Plus, other websites don't give a turd if someone engages in bigotry.

Also, I'm going to repeat myself one of the things I said last.

Of course someone is going to break up with me, and even date someone else whether its male/female. More importantly, I don't want someone who uses me for stupid things, whether they're a cheater or none. My first bf when I was straight said that I'm allowed to cheat on him, which was a bad sign, therefore I don't wanna cheat on anyone.

That means, I accept break ups, and if they have a new relationship, but let's say for example, remember I told you about that girl I was going to date. Well, the thing is in her case, she was promiscuous with men, she smokes marajuana/weed/etc, and I finally realized she was just using me for experimental games. At gay HSs the HS is for people who are lgbt and going through turd. She was obviously going through that but she's not really lgbt.

The thing is, I don't wanna date someone who is like that. Some people could use me for attention and etc. You know what I mean b/c you wouldn't wanna be used, right?

--------------------
~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

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Heather
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I am not making assumptions about your choices. What I am asking is for you to check in with yourself to make sure you feel capable of following the guidelines. If not, this simply isn't going to be a sound place for you and everyone else who uses it.

I hear you in that we are unusual, including around creating safe space. However, part of doing that means keeping that space safe for everyone and holding everyone to those guidelines, which includes you. I get that you enjoy having a safe space, but to do that, you also will make sure you are making your own efforts to keep the space safe for others.

I do think that if going to this school (are you talking about Harvey Milk?) is an option for you, it would be sound for you and your mother to make a visit. However, I think you will need to adjust your expectations in terms of the other students, some of whom very well may behave like, say, that girl you are describing, no matter their orientation. Being LGBT does not make anyone immune from choosing multiple sexual partners, choosing male partners, using recreational drugs or experimenting with others romantically or sexually. Those things also don't mean (or do) someone isn't having a hard time.

If and when you visit the school, you may also want to have some talks with them about what it's for and how relevant it may or may not be to your dating life. If you are primarily viewing it as a way for you to date, that's probably not the soundest thing to consider.

[ 02-04-2011, 05:08 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Ste-Funnie
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Quote: "However, I think you will need to adjust your expectations in terms of the other students, some of whom very well may behave like, say, that girl you are describing, no matter their orientation. Being LGBT does not make anyone immune from choosing multiple sexual partners, choosing male partners, using recreational drugs or experimenting with others romantically or sexually. Those things also don't mean (or do) someone isn't having a hard time."

You'll never get my point of view in that part. Forget that. At least you're still helping me on the grounds that it ain't that important. More importantly, I just wanna go to that school. Not everything to do with dating. I'll still have relationship problems either way.

The thing is, I don't think that school is for people who are not really on LGBT thingy. That girl wouldn't go to that school.

Also if it ever does happen that it turns out this sight ain't "sound" for me, I wanna know what other sights are like this, just incase. On the grounds that if it does happen, I can't not talk about my problems on days I don't have therapy. Not all my problems are stuff I can talk to my mom about. So do you have any ideas, again, just incase?

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

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Heather
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Again, are you talking about the Harvey Milk School in Manhattan (which seems awfully far away from you to go to regardless)?

If so, know that some students go there who are not gay, lesbian or bisexual. Not all trans gender people are LGB, but some students attend there who are not LGB or trans gender. Questioning and heterosexual students also attend Harvey Milk School.

When asking for other sites, are you asking about other young adult/teen sex education sites in particular? Or something more general than what we do, but which might be a better fit for you?

[ 02-04-2011, 07:56 PM: Message edited by: Heather ]

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

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Ste-Funnie
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Last paragraph, a little bit of both.

And no I am looking for a gay school on long island in suffolk. And yeah, straight people would go there but do most go there to use people and get attention or do they go there to support?

LIGALY and other services are different than the schools. For example, if you do inappropriate physical things I see people do at LIGALY etc (whether it's w/ the same/opp. sex) in any school, you can get suspended. On the grounds that that's not what I go to those places for, whether it's a school, club, or anything.

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

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Karybu
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It isn't possible for us to know the motivation of students who attend any school, although I doubt that the main reason anyone attends any school is to get attention.

As for "inappropriate" behaviour, you don't really get a say in how people act around you, as long as they're not harming you or anyone else. Every institution has different rules, too, so while some schools may suspend any student caught doing "inappropriate physical things" (still not clear on what those are, exactly) other schools will not take that route.

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"Another world is not only possible, she is on her way. On a quiet day, I can hear her breathing." -Arundhati Roy

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Ste-Funnie
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Ah forget it! I feel like I'm trying to talk to a spanish person who don't speak english. I don't mean anything racist. I'm just using a comparison. I speak a very little of spanish. I can't use a full long sentence of it. Sometimes I mess it up. This is exactly what this is like. Idk if any of you guys are hispanic or speak it but I can't get y'all to understand nuttin'.

The point is, I want to go to the school and whether I go there or not, more importantly than the the topic about inappropriate behavior, I just don't need to be used for atrociously stupid things. And I mean really bad things. Thats all.

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

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Stephanie_1
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Ste-Funnie: A little lesson in conversational social skills? When people say things like "I don't mean anything racist" it's because what they said or are about to say is something that is or can be seen as being a racist comment. It's like saying "Not to be rude but..." because it's always followed by something that is rude and the person knows it really can insult someone. So when you feel the need to put one of those comments before or right after something you say, it's really going to be better not to make the comment or the comparison. (Such as you did here, because the comparison really *is* inappropriate).

Furthermore, I don't think it's that we don't understand what you're saying so much as you don't understand what everyone is saying in response to what you've said. For instance, while LIGALY was not a good fit for you, it doesn't make it a bad place. Lots of people have been helped there and found support there. However; you made a statement in an earlier post that you went looking for potential partners, and LIGALY is there for support, not as a dating organization. As well, you're making comments about how people would use you, but you don't really have any basis for knowing they WOULD use you. When you read your words, it DOES sound like you were saying that people dating you then leaving you and dating a guy was using you, when unless they were dating you to get close to the other person (like the person is your friend and they were dating you to get closer to them somehow) then what would the basis for this be?

So who's to say anyone at the school OR at LIGALY OR at any other place would be using you. Ultimately it's not that we don't understand it's that you're throwing out about how people may use you without giving any reason to suspect that people are, have been, or will. Make sense? As well? Your little mantra there about how we don't understand a thing you say is (as we've seen quite a few times with you) quite rude/disrespectful considering the amount of time everyone here has spent answering your posts.

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"Sometimes the majority only means that all the fools are on the same side" ~Anon

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Ste-Funnie
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This is getting ridiculous. My reasons are my reasons.

I didn't mean anything racist. I am never racist. I like hispanic people. I have a friend at LIGALY who is Ecuadorian and his family is racist against hispanics who aren't Ecuadorian. I think that's jank!

And you really don't understand me. For the 80th time, I did not say that dating a guy after dating me meant using. Like I said, it would be like saying that I was using my cat that ran away by getting a new cat. I said no such thing. You sound like you're trying to tell me that using people is a myth. It ain't!

I didn't start this topic to start a rukus. All I needed was you're help and you did. Thanks for all you people who did.

I am going to close this topic so we can all cool this off.

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

Posts: 251 | From: Long Island | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ste-Funnie
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whoops! I didn't know I couldn't close it. Only staff can. Can somebody close this for me?

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~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

Posts: 251 | From: Long Island | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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