Donate Now
We've Moved! Check out our new boards.
  
my profile | directory login | search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » LGBTQA Relationships » My Girlfriend

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: My Girlfriend
open&out
Neophyte
Member # 45369

Icon 1 posted      Profile for open&out     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
My girlfriend and I are sexually active, and she is really worried about her looks and feels better when she looks like guy. So, I am looking for a strap on that will provide her with pleasure when she is going in me. Also that she can wear it under pants, such as: jeans, but able to feel good inside. As for the strap on, I need to find one that does not show through jeans. I want to get her one that looks more realistic but not to much, because I find dicks to be gross. I am a lesbian for a reason after all. I Love Her so much and even if she got a sex change I would stay with her. She doesn't want to go through surgery, but she rather be male than female, she says it feels better. How can I help her? I like dykes so it is easier for her to look like a guy and not bother me; However what can I do about the dildo part?
Posts: 2 | From: Richmond BC | Registered: Jan 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
bluejumprope
Scarleteen Volunteer
Member # 40774

Icon 1 posted      Profile for bluejumprope     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Welcome to Scarleteen, open&out. [Smile]

The shopping part is outside of our scope, but a good sex toy store will be able to give you recommendations. Venus Envy or Come As You Are (in CA), and Babeland (in the US), are great resources.

How else can we help? Are you asking about how you can be more supportive of your girlfriend? Would you like to talk more about how you're feeling about her gender identity?

--------------------
without tenderness, we are in hell. -Adrienne Rich

Posts: 407 | From: USA | Registered: Oct 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
open&out
Neophyte
Member # 45369

Icon 1 posted      Profile for open&out     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
ya a little i want her to feel happier with her self. i just want to know what might help her more
Posts: 2 | From: Richmond BC | Registered: Jan 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Has she sought out a therapist to help her with her gender identity issues yet?

If not, but she wants (and you do, too), a good book to start with which is really empowering and helpful with this stuff, see if you two can't find a copy of Kate Bornstein's "My Gender Workbook." It's a good first step when it comes to gender identity.

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Heather     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I also want to add that disinterest and aversion are not the same thing.

In other words, the reason most lesbian women are lesbian women is because they have sexual and emotional interest in women, but disinterest in men. Having an AVERSION (eg, finding certain body parts gross) is generally not why most women are lesbian, because NOT liking men or something about them doesn't mean liking women, just like not liking oranges doesn't mean I'll necessarily like apples. Make sense?

--------------------
Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ste-Funnie
Activist
Member # 50934

Icon 1 posted      Profile for Ste-Funnie     Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I kind of agree with you on the part you said that ur a lesbian and you dont like penises b/c of course, lesbians want to have sex with girls. In fact, if i was in the situation, I would tell her she she should be herself and that as long as she is happy with who she, you will be happy too.

Also I admire how you say you would date her even if she changed her sex, b/c you want her to be who she is inside. Plus, I'm guessing that she's a nice woman, and you love her for her. In my case, I (I'm talking about me) wouldn't date any guy, even if it's a man that naturally used to be a woman, b/c I dont want anything to do with a real penis. I mean, I would sleep with a woman using a dildo, as long as she's not doing it b/c she feels like she has to be a boy b/c thats not even why I use those.

Oh, another suggestion. I have seen one of these dildos that have double ends. incase youre having trouble telling what I mean and what the use is, one end goes inside_that, the other end, goes on the other side. Maybe that would help you guys

--------------------
~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

Posts: 251 | From: Long Island | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

   Close Topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete Topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Contact Us | Get the Whole Story! Go Home to SCARLETEEN: Sex Ed for the Real World | Privacy Statement

Copyright 1998, 2014 Heather Corinna/Scarleteen
Scarleteen.com: Providing comprehensive sex education online to teens and young adults worldwide since 1998

Information on this site is provided for educational purposes. It is not meant to and cannot substitute for advice or care provided by an in-person medical professional. The information contained herein is not meant to be used to diagnose or treat a health problem or disease, or for prescribing any medication. You should always consult your own healthcare provider if you have a health problem or medical condition.

Powered by UBB.classic™ 6.7.3