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Author Topic: The proper response?
Phish
Neophyte
Member # 40172

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[Mad] [Mad] [Mad]
So, I'm back (so soon).
I have several gay and bi friends. I've always supported their relationships, taken the straight ally pledge, adovated, the whole nine yards. Unfortunately, however, there will always be bigots in this world, and I keep running into the same problem that has reared its ugly head once again today.
My very best gay friend came to me today, very upset, after a classmate called him by several rude phrases, including that ultimate insult, the f-word (not the four-letter one).
Really, when other people act like this, and hurt my friends who are only trying to live as they feel they must, it makes me want to track down the culprits and eviscerate their sorry bodies with a rusty kitchen knife. Recalling the current laws regarding human eviseration, however, I would like to know: what is the best respose to this kind of attitude? What can I say that expresses my disapproval (and disgust) without blowing a fuse?
Thanks your your advice!

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One Love!

Posts: 23 | From: Here. There? | Registered: Sep 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Phish
Neophyte
Member # 40172

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This is a P.S., of sorts...
Would it be better to talk to the culprit himself, or go to the school principal, or both? Also, what should I say to my friend? I told him that the comments were, of course, completely unacceptable, and that I was sorry that he was hurt, etc., but is there anything else I could say to help him? ie, advice on how he should handle similar situations in the future?
P.S.S. It it okay for me to post a P.S., if I've forgotten something, or is it rude? I don't want to be irritating.
Thanks.

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One Love!

Posts: 23 | From: Here. There? | Registered: Sep 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
PenguinBoy
Activist
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Heya Phish

Disemboweling people is not an ideal way to solve anything. I know you're not being serious but it is important to remember that actually numerous LGBT people continue to be persecuted around the world with violence and it's never pretty.

As per what to do with comments like this, telling the school principal is one of the things that should help the problem throughout the school... that sort of verbal abuse is not acceptable anywhere, and I'd hope the school would do what they can to impress that - I don't know how specific you could be if you were making the complaint without your friend's consent.

It is fantastic that you're even trying to stick up for him. That above all else is what will make the difference in how he feels. It's the sort of thing that people never forget.

(oh, and if you want to avoid "PS"-ing, you can press the edit button, which looks like a pencil and paper, and make changes to your previous posts)

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Jacob - my Scarleteen Blog - Please help sustain scarleteen

Posts: 633 | From: Bedfordshire, UK | Registered: Apr 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Phish
Neophyte
Member # 40172

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Hi!

Well, obviously, I wouldn't act upon those urges. It is just that, if there's one thing that makes me absolutely irrate, it's idiots who ridicule people (especially my friends) who simply want to live their lives the way they want/must. I've dealt with the same jerks for years, and have been made fun of myself for it, and I'm simply sick of it.

I'll talk to my friend about visiting the principal. Actually, the homophobia in our backwards, redneck, podunk town seems to have increased lately, unfortunately. I think the general dicrimination towards several of my friends has finally rising to the boiling point, so it's probably time to take our fabulous selves to the office and speak up.

quote:
It is fantastic that you're even trying to stick up for him. That above all else is what will make the difference in how he feels. It's the sort of thing that people never forget.

Thanks for that. It is only a small group of us at the school who are straight and actively advocate and support LGBT equal rights, and it's encouraging when we hear stuff like that, especially from the friends we are advocating for. Oh, and thanks for the editing advice, hahah. I can be a little slow, occasionally. [Big Grin]

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One Love!

Posts: 23 | From: Here. There? | Registered: Sep 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Heather
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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By the by, in any area of the states where you are having problems with GLBT harassment in your school and the administration is NOT doing anything or just will not, there is a very good recourse.

What you want to do in that case is to contact GLSEN. They are ready and able (and have many times before) to come in in those cases and help students with this.

Here is their contact information, should you need it: http://www.glsen.org/cgi-bin/iowa/all/about/locations/index.html

I'd also say that with things like this, you want to be proactive ahead of the game. GLBT harassment, when it becomes the norm, can tend to escalate and get very ugly -- even literally dangerous -- very quickly. So, by all means, if things have been escalating, don't put off talking to the principal or school board: hop on that now. Again, if you need help, ask for it, and GLSEN is a good place to start if you can't find someone like a good teacher to be a co-advocate with you.

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Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
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Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68189 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Phish
Neophyte
Member # 40172

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Awesome! Thanks for the link. I think that once we officialy make a complaint to the office, they'll clear it up. It's just one of those things that most teachers and authority kind of turn a blind eye to until someone calls them out for it. But I'll be damned if it continues this way. Enough is enough.

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One Love!

Posts: 23 | From: Here. There? | Registered: Sep 2008  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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