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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » LGBTQA Relationships » I feel so horrible

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Author Topic: I feel so horrible
Member # 35598

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Theres a boy at my school who has a crush on me. Today he came up and said to me that he has liked me ever since 6th grade (were now in 9th) and he wanted to know if I felt the same way. Well I didn't want to lie to him, so I told him the truth. I said that I am a lesbian, and that pretty much tells him no. I feel so bad now cause I know that I broke his heart. What should I do?
Posts: 34 | From: USA | Registered: Oct 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 27966

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It always is hard to turn someone down, especially if they've had a thing for you for so long. But you know, you just have to remember that it had to be done- you can't deny your sexuality and your interests just to make the guy happy. And this way, now he can finally move past this on to someone who is interested in him. [Smile] It's just part of life, and there's no need to feel bad. You did what you had to do.


Posts: 2332 | From: Canada | Registered: Mar 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 28394

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Well it may actually have been kinder that you told him straight where he stands. If he's liked you for that long then it may take him a while to get over it, so him hanging onto little bits of hope really wouldn't be the most helpful thing... but you could try talking to him to see how he's getting on. And just being friendly could offer him some encouragement... after all it's nothing you've got against him, so this again could be something which could make a process easier for him.

Don't feel horrible (easier said than done, but honestly), this is who you are and how you feel, and it's not your fault at all.

Jacob - my Scarleteen Blog - Please help sustain scarleteen

Posts: 633 | From: Bedfordshire, UK | Registered: Apr 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Member # 50934

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Well, that happened to me. Some guy, when I was in 9th grade complained to me like, "Oh, You're the prettiest girl ever! If you weren't gay I'd ask you out". To tell you the truth, I gave in. I'm a Junior now, and we've been broken up for over a full year. Now I can say no. I think maybe you should tell him that he'll find another girl. Tell him "Dont worry. There are plenty of straight girls out there. You'll find someone."

Also, you just said that you're a lesbian, and your profile says that you're straight. I'm just a little confused. Do you think you can maybe explain it to me?

~Stephanie Gabriella Murray
I'm very gay for being a lesbian, and not gay to be what I'm not

Posts: 251 | From: Long Island | Registered: Dec 2010  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Executive Director & Founder
Member # 3

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(Ste-Funnie: this post is from two years ago, so chances are, this user will not be back round any time soon.

But just for the record, we generally don't question other users in that way, too, okay?)

Heather Corinna, Executive Director & Founder, Scarleteen
About Me Get our book!
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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