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» Scarleteen Boards: 2000 - 2014 (Archive) » SCARLETEEN CENTRAL » LGBTQA Relationships » honesty

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Author Topic: honesty
Member # 12425

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i am seeing guy who is totally great. i am bisexual and i have not told him this. is it really lying if the topic really has not come up? do i even have make him aware of it?? most people really are not.

Posts: 12 | From: wisconsin | Registered: Mar 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
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If you have other partners who you are bisexual WITH, then yes, absolutely.

Otherwise, what you're talking about is identity, so really, it's about how big a factor it is in who you are.

For instance, while I usually do tell partners of mine my nationality in passing, I don't feel obliged to, because it's a small part of my identity and not only are they likely to find that out as they get to know me, it's not something likely to impinge upon their wants and needs or feelings.

On the other hand, I *am* likely to say from the onset that I'm bisexual, because not only is that a pretty major part of my identity, I'm active with both genders and it IS likely to be something they may want to consider. And I want to be sure I'm with someone who can accept if not embrace that in me. I don't want someone dating me and not knowing the bigger 90and non-negotiable) parts of who I am.

But it's absolutely your call, and only you can figure that out.

Heather Corinna
Editor and Founder, Scarleteen

My epitaph should read: "She worked herself into this ground."
-- Kay Bailey Hutchinson

Posts: 68290 | From: An island near Seattle | Registered: May 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator

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